


In His Shadow

by Girlaremo



Series: The Ryou Chronicles [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angsty Brother time, FindShiro2017, Finding Shiro, I'm not sure how to tag this, It's great being the second sibling, Multi, but - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2018-11-13 03:39:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 35,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11176233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Girlaremo/pseuds/Girlaremo
Summary: Ryou Shirogane, also known as 'Takashi's Brother'. A second rate pilot and an engineer and mechanic at the top of his league, and a Garrison Dropout.  His brother's disappearance brought him back home to their hometown, living up the side of a mountain, listening for whatever he can find at the edge of his known universe.When a call from the Garrison with an offer of a lifetime, his response could potentially change his life forever.





	1. Chapter 1

It wasn't the way he thought he'd start his work week. He had known full and well that Takashi was going on a bit of a far out expedition with the Holts, Samuel and Matthew in order to get ice samples from Kerberos. Sure. He had radioed Ryou from the ship a few times, talking about the things that Sam and Matt did during the day, and how piloting was pretty laid back, save for a few snags in the pathway they had charted out. But, all was well at the end of the day when he hung up the call.

He didn't think that he'd wake up to his mother's frantic crying over the phone, about how Takashi was missing in space after something happened to their craft. Ryou could feel his stomach sink, and his heart plummeted. Throwing on the first clothes he could find, he tried to console his mother, but she was in hysterics. His phone kept on pinging messages from Facebook and all over, friends calling him about Takashi's disappearance, what was going on.

The next few weeks were a blur. They had declared the three crew members to be lost in space, and that they were gone for good. The Garrison had paid for Jun and Makoto Shirogane to fly to the mainland so that they could attend the funeral and memorial services for the three of them.

There were no bodies to display, so at least he didn't have to stare at someone who had the same face. The picture they used of him for the memorial service didn't do him any justice. It was the one that they had taken when he went into the space program for the Garrison, and his hair had been cut high and tight, and the look he gave was cold and empty. The Takashi he remembered would have at least tried to smile.

There were white lilies everywhere, and the perfume of them was almost suffocating. He didn't remember crying at all, but his parents were both trying to keep from bawling. It didn't feel right to him. This wasn't a funeral. It wasn't happening, it just wasn't... Even when he stood with Katie and Colleen Holt and his parents, his poor mother holding the folded flag that almost looked too big for her small frame.

Looking over at Colleen and Katie, they both looked hollow. Had they been expecting this? Had the news reports gotten to them? Katie looked tired, purple bags under her eyes and a vacant expression on her face. She hadn't been sleeping.

Looking back down at his own shoes as they gave a twenty one gun salute, he felt his heart beat with each shock of the salute.

 _Blam!_ He's gone.

 _Blam!_ This can't be happening.

 _Blam!_ He can't be.

 

It was all a haze of 'I'm sorry for your loss.' 'I'm so sorry, Ryou.' 'You take care of your parents...you're all they have left, now.' Iverson couldn't even bear to look at Ryou for too long, pursing his lips and clapping a hand to Ryou's shoulder. “Your brother was a good man, and a damn good pilot. It's terrible what happened, and I'm sorry for your loss.”

 _Good pilot._ That was it. He wanted to scream, he wanted to know why he let Takashi go on a expedition that could have ended like this. Was he wrong for doing that, or was it just something out of their hands? He had no idea, but he wanted to blame someone. Someone needed to know how bad he felt so that they could feel the same way. “Thank you. I appreciate your sympathy.” Twenty one shells in a drawstring pouch, his things from his dorm, and a folded up flag were all that was left of him.

It all fit into a few boxes, most of his clothes packed away so that they could be shipped back home, probably put into storage because Jun couldn't bear to let that part of him go. A week after the funeral, Ryou decided it was time to move home. After all, he had done all that he wanted to do, getting his own degree in engineering, but ended up working a sales job at a local grocery store. What a life to live.

The first month was the worst. He could hear his father hitting golf balls at all hours of the night, and his mother would sit in Takashi's old room. It hadn't been touched in years, and everything was just the same. She'd sit and hold one of his favorite shirts, her face buried in the familiar smelling cloth.

He didn't blame her. She had lost one of her children. One of her babies she had raised from the ground up. The ones that they had promised wouldn't make it because she was so small. The one child that turned to twins right before their eyes.

Makoto wasn't discreet with his sorrows, picking up smoking again after he had quit so long ago. He took long rides on his motorcycle around town, coming back with his hair swept back and an empty pack of cigarettes. Sometimes Ryou caught him just standing in Takashi's room, looking at all the pictures that hung on the wall. Some were Polaroid snaps that hung via sticky tack, labeled and dated as to when they happened.

There was always a candle burning for Takashi, though. There'd always be fresh cut flowers from the garden next to his picture, and an incense stick that slowly burned throughout the day. The whole house smelled of sandalwood. Everyone would pay their respects, and go on with their day as the months went on.

Yet it wasn't just the same for Ryou. He started building. He built a computer, pieced together a radar dish that could get as far as Saturn, but he was getting help from another friend to extend that a bit farther. He spent all day and all night listening to chatter on the stations, turning dials and knobs. He got himself a place high up on one of the mountain roads so that he could study. It became his lab, and the bungalow style place became the home of 'Crazy Ryou'. People had already thought he lost it when he sat out on his roof at night and scanned the heavens for any sort of proof that someone or something was out there other than themselves.

The answer came one day, a year after Takashi's disappearance.

 

\- * - * - * - * -

 

The humidity itself had been making him stick to everything, and everything stuck to him. Papers, pens, a lone paperclip that had been resting on his desk. With the morning light shining through the slatted wooden blinds, it was just enough to start waking the man who was sleeping on his desk, the computer monitors having fallen asleep. On a distant corner of his desk, his phone was ringing and there was nobody to answer, the alarm from about an hour ago still coming up.

Groaning lightly at the faint sound of vibrating and the tinkling sounds, Ryou picked up his face from the desk, a couple of post its and a sheet of now half-damp paper falling from his face, the pen marks showing up on his tanned skin. Looking around, everything was as he left it at about four in the morning, and the sun was up so that meant... “ _Oh shit!_ ” Scuttling from his chair and to the door, checking the mirror before he left. He looked like shit.

It wasn't like he could really fix anything about it since he was running so late for his job at the gas station in their town. Instead, he smoothed his hair back and tucked it into a loose beanie before heading out the door, hoping there weren't any stains on his clothes from the morning before. Sure, he had all the great side effects of wearing his clothes all day and night, but he was in a hurry and timing was better than what he looked and-or smelled like at the moment. _That's it, I've biffed it. I'm gonna be unemployed after today._

While the fact that he actually had a place of his own up the hillside, his vehicle reflected how broke he was. It had originally been a fix up project that he and Takashi were working on before they went to New Mexico for trade school. It had been a little sky blue '64 Volkswagen that was originally supposed to be a painter and show car, but it ended up being used for normal driving instead. With it being pretty damn rusty, there was no way that he could fix it the way he wanted it now. There was also a crack in the windshield, the wipers didn't work, and the radio itself had gone kaput, and he couldn't replace it.

Trying to start it up was also a nightmare. It was so touchy anymore that if he even moved wrong, the whole car shuddered and died. Frantically trying to start it, babying the gas and the clutch as he turned the key, the car sputtered and tried turning over, but nothing came. “Come on, come on...” Trying again and again, it made the same noise, until _ka-thrrnk_. Ryou's face dropped at the sound, screaming in his car as he let go of the steering wheel.

He knew people couldn't hear him from where he was at, and that was a good thing. Getting out of his car, he ran for the house again, grabbing the old mountain bike from high school, and readied that in the driveway to speed down the road to where he needed to be. _If I get enough momentum, I'd at least get at least twenty miles..._ He thought to himself, peddling down the road as gravity started working and the whirring of the tires filled the air.

With the wind in his face, he realized he probably should have gotten some sunglasses or something, since he looked like an utter mess and he was most obviously going to be fired, he might as well have worn them to make sure that his boss wouldn't see him crying as he left. (After all, he _was_ sleep deprived and being a softie at heart even after that year or so of military training, some things still stung.)

The bike plan for getting down the road was going well until he got into town and he was quickly realizing why he didn't use his bike. Pumping the handlebar breaks, they scraped and squeaked, but they didn't do anything to slow him down. Peddling backwards? Not a fucking chance. That did nothing but jammed up the bike chain so that it didn't even work. Dragging his feet along the ground, he tried slowing himself down so that he wouldn't run into anyone as the town was starting to gain a bit of speed and the people were starting to wake up.

If it wasn't enough that Ryou didn't have any breaks, nor did he have any way to accelerate, but he was drifting through intersections, eventually slowing down enough so that he could try and get off, only to not realize that when he got off, he smacked himself against a phone pole. Late for work, overslept, tired, car wouldn't start, no time to bathe, and now he got a giant bump on his forehead. Nice. It stung a bit, but Ryou didn't have time to worry about it, finally running his bike to the gas station, where his boss was waiting for him right outside with his arms crossed.

“Mister Kahale, I can explain, I,” Before Ryou could speak, Mister Kahale held up his hand. He was a bit of a stout man, tanned skin and freckled all over the place, some of them looked more like moles and age spots when it came to the top of his receding hairline. Grey hair had long since sprouted up from when Ryou knew him when he was younger, but looking at him now, his eyes had hardened and he looked at Ryou like a disappointed parent.

“Oh, there's no need to explain. That's the fourth time you've showed up late and looking like that this _week._ How the _hell_ did you split your head open?” What? Reaching up, Ryou touched his forehead and pulled back his fingers, bits of red coming back on his fingertips. Usually Mister Kahale was a kind man who just wanted someone to work hard for him and respect the community. Someone so late and 'lazy' as Ryou was got on his nerves quickly. “In the four months you've been here, I've pulled all your shifts, and I've got people waiting for me to look at their applications.”

Sighing heavily, Ryou hung his head. “I get what you're saying.” He nodded, picking his nametag off of his shirt before handing it over to Mister Kahale. He gave Ryou a bit of a heavy look before shaking his head.

“Just go get your head fixed, kid.” Ryou watched his former employer hobble back into his shop, leaving Ryou with a bleeding forehead and the handlebars of his bike in his hands. Sighing heavily, he de-snagged the bike chain and hopped on, careful to monitor his speed so that he could stop once he got to the clinic down the street. He probably looked like a mess, or like he got mugged. Well, it wouldn't be the worst ending to the day.

O o O o O o O o O o O o O o O

 

“You did _what?_ ” Jun had started to baby Ryou as soon as he walked through the door with stitches in his forehead. The gash had happened right in front of the start of his eyebrow, making him look angry no matter what he did. It was actually pretty sore because he moved his forehead a lot. It just meant that for a few weeks, he'd have to keep a resting bitch face. When he had told her what happened with his job, she clammed up a bit, pursing her lips into a thin line. “This is the fourth time in four months you've gotten fired, Ryou"

“It's not like I meant to get fired from Kahale's, ma. It's just...” Ryou paused for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck as his mother stared at him from across the kitchen, and his father sat at the kitchen table with his son.

“You stayed up too late listening for God knows what out there.” Makoto said softly, knowing the routine all too well. Ryou just looked downward out of remorse, causing his father to sigh heavily as Jun let her arms flop to her sides, rolling her eyes to the ceiling.

It was obvious that his parents didn't know how to handle this, as for Ryou it was a sort of release, kind of a therapy for him, a way to cope with Takashi's disappearance. But it wasn't helping him in the long run, because bills needed to be paid, and he still had to fix the car that was sitting in his driveway. “...I also need to borrow a bit of money. My car broke down again.”

“And you still don't have service on your phone, do you?” Jun added, turning back to cross her arms, watching as he lowered his head further. “You can't keep leaving my phone number as the number to reach you by—You've been at work or at your place, and you hardly ever come home—I can't keep sending you messages about when people call, I have my own job, you know!”

“Plus, the Garrison keeps calling.” Makoto added, mirroring his wife's attitude towards Ryou's whole situation. They were accepting parents, kind and open when need be, but they played quite a bit of 'good cop, bad cop', flipping the roles back and forth sometimes when confronting their children. Or, for now, child.

“I paid off the student loan let over three years ago.” Three years ago, he had dropped out due to personal problems, leaving Takashi to be the only Shirogane in the building. Soon enough, he graduated, became one of the instructors and the best pilot of his time. It was only because Ryou came in second best that he decided that piloting wasn't for him. Being in the shadow of his brother just wasn't for him, he had decided. Now all that was left of him _was_ the shadow he left behind.

“They're not calling about student loans.” Jun stated. “They're wondering if you want a job.” Ryou lifted his head rather quickly, head rush almost getting to him.

Jun herself was still quite bitter about the Garrison and its facilities, being one of the mothers that acted like they had committed a crime. There were plenty of scathing remarks that she had made about 'how could you lose three people? It was _not_ pilot error! The best pilots don't crash!' Even so, the way she looked about the situation at hand in the present let him know that she was _not_ happy about it.

“You'd have to go back to New Mexico, and they didn't give any specifics on what you'd be doing.” Makoto explained, furrowing his brows a bit. Compared to Jun, he looked quite a bit softer. He was worried, and even if Jun looked like she was trying to crush a rock with her teeth, she was worried as well.

The job offer seemed to come at just the right time, but for all the wrong reasons. Today was the day that Takashi disappeared. There were also reports of lights over New Mexico, and strange sightings of a giant unidentified flying object. He had heard it on the radio when he got the stitches in his forehead, and it was just... Things were piecing together like a wildly misshaped puzzle. “That doesn't make any sense.” Ryou frowned at them both, looking between them.

“Even so, you really don't have a reason to decline,” Jun was a bit harsh with her words, but she didn't like beating around the bush, and Ryou did owe them money at the moment. Still, she rested her hand on Makoto's shoulder, pressing her lips into a thin line. She didn't want her last son to go back to New Mexico. “But your father's workplace is hiring. It'd only be part time, but you'd be able to stay here.”

“Ma, I don't have any experience in the kitchen. I burn water, and I'm a terrible waiter.” Ryou frowned widely. “I'm sure I'll find some other work around the island, if anything else, I can renew my pilot's license and do the shuttle from island to island.” He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. It was a thought, but it was always long days flying charter planes. Not to mention, he had too many jobs on his resume to really think about applying to be a pilot at the airport. They wouldn't even consider him for TSA.

“Just as long as you get something, though.” Makoto nodded. “We'll at least give them your skype information so that they can call you on the computer. After all, you've still got another month left on your internet, right?”

“Yeah, I'll be fine until that runs out.” Even so, the day went on as normal as the day was. Ryou helped with making dinner, helped his mother clean the house, and eventually, his dad brought him back up the side of the hill to work on his car in Ryou's shop. Ryou knew what he was doing, as he had taken the vehicle apart multiple times. Makoto was mostly there to hand him tools and talk.

It ended about nine in the evening when they got the bug working again, and hopefully it would hold a bit better than it had last time. Sitting on the front step with the radio playing in the background, Ryou had brought out the last couple of beers from his refrigerator. “Thanks for saving me from ma back there.”

“Ah, don't mention it. If she isn't in control of things she gets anxious. She worries about you, you know.” Makoto popped the top off effortlessly, blowing into the bottle out of years of habit before taking a sip.

The weather was nice this evening, and the bug zapper wasn't too busy above their heads. While the air was cooling in the late evening, but it was pleasant. “I know she does...” Ryou followed suit with poping the lid open, fiddling with the bottle cap between his fingers. “She did the same thing when we both said we wanted to apply for the Garrison for trade school.”

“Yeah...She expected you to go to California or New York,” Makoto snorted, a bit of a smile coming to his face. Ryou had always noticed how Makoto looked like he belonged. He had a rectangular shaped face, and with age, he gained a bit of a belly to him, and he always had a heavy tan from him working in the back yard after his job. He worked at a restaurant on the beach with his best frient, Apollo, for half the year, and the other half of the year, but his first job was being a mechanic. That's where Takashi and Ryou got their love for tinkering and messing with cars from. “She said 'My boys could have become engineers! They want to be fly boys! I didn't raise fly boys!'”

In comparison, Jun had the average round to heart shaped face that her parents in Japan did, age touching gently on her face, dark hair pulled back into a pony tail most of the time, greying through the sides. Of course, she was quite easygoing to start with, but the life with Makoto made her even softer, turning her into a warm ray of sunshine until her boys did something to upset her.

“She should have thought of that when Takashi broke my arm pushing me off of the roof.” Ryou retorted, the both of them breaking into laughter. “...It's been a year now, though.”

“Yeah...” Another sip, and Makoto sighed lightly, looking into the bottle before dumping some out of his. Ryou followed suit, as if it were natural. “Although, he probably would have preferred vodka and kool-aid to beer.”

“Another point to him growing up a mama's boy.” It was another bout of laughter, and more talk about how things had changed so much in a year, and how the two of them were so different. They talked for quite a while until the sun had fully set, and the only light around them was the light of the front porch, and the soft glow of the bug zapper.

“It just...” Makoto started, heaving a heavy sigh as he gathered his words. “It doesn't feel like he's gone.” He said softly, his expression fading to a soft sort of emotion, muddled with a bit of thoughtful intention. “It's like that feeling when you said you wouldn't be home for Christmas the first year you two went to school, but you surprised us anyways by walking in the front door.” He huffed and smiled, shaking his head slowly. “It's stupid, it really is. I keep thinking that one day when I look at the door, he'll come back.”

Ryou himself sometimes thought like that, thinking that maybe he'd hear his brother talk behind him and he'd be home. Putting an arm around his father's shoulders, he sighed. “Me too, dad.” He couldn't imagine the pain of a parent losing their child, when all their lives they believed that they'd be the first to go. It was bad enough that Ryou felt like he was just the copy and paste version of his 'Golden Boy' brother. He wasn't the S Rank pilot that helped make the first run to Saturn, nor was the winner of the plethora of medals he was granted for being top of his class, or graduated valedictorian. Even if he was gone, he was still stuck in his shadow. Second born, second best.

Even after Makoto finished his beer and left for the evening, Ryou still stayed awake for a while, going back to his setup in his room, scanning over different frequencies, listening for any sounds past Kerberos. At this point, he was starting to get tired and annoyed, frustrated with himself for being such a failure, and angry that he was left alone on a goddamned island with nothing but the shoes Takashi had left behind. He could still hear the odd repeating words in his headphones. Voltron, Voltron, Voltron... It was strange.

Finally giving up for the night, he turned off the monitors, turning on the functions to search for any triggered words. Kerberos, Matt Holt, Samuel Holt, Sam, Matt, Takashi Shirogane, the number of the ship they used, anything. Having used an old phone's dictation function, he'd get a notification if the computer 'heard' anything.

So far, the radio had picked up nothing, but by morning, he'd at least have something to get him moving again. For then, he crawled into bed and pulled the blankets up over his head, sighing heavily as his head hit the pillows, venturing into the realm of sleep.

 


	2. Chapter 2

“ _What do you want to be when you grow up?” The question back then seemed so simple. It was like asking what color was his favorite, or if he really loved his brother. Ryou beamed, grinning widely at the question._

“ _I wanna be an astronaut, or a race car driver!” Bouncing up and down in his seat, he looked to Takashi, who was still thinking. “We could both be astronauts!”_

“ _You couldn't be an astronaut! The aliens would eat you!” One of the other kids in his first grade class piped up, getting a very sour look from Ryou and a bit of a mournful one from Takashi._

_It was evident who was the softer spoken sibling, and who was more outgoing and most likely to start a fight. Usually one would say it would be the older sibling sticking out for the younger, but it was the other way around. “We could be astronauts if we wanted to. Why can't we be friends with the aliens?”_

_Even so, the conversation was dismissed as soon as the teacher went on with her conversation, talking about how they could draw what they wanted to be and write a few sentences about it._

_It was so simple back then._ It was so simple, but there was no going back now.

The memory had been a part of a hazy dream that floated around his head when he heard the alarm for his phone go off. It was at the six thirty mark, yesterday's alarm that kept going off. Groaning lightly, Ryou rubbed a hand through his hair and frowned, realizing that he forgot to shower. Again. Narrowing his eyes at the source of the sound, he grumbled and reached over to the night stand and picked up his phone, turning off the alarm. Checking around, there were no new notifications, save for the fact that someone had added him on Skype overnight. Someone must have called again, hunh?

Putting the phone back down, he frowned at the ceiling, watching the dim morning light slowly ease in. Sooner or later, it'd be too warm to even think about sleeping, then the rain would eventually move in and cool everything out. Closing his eyes for a moment, he went back to his thoughts.

Probably should go on a run. Probably should do something. Maybe look at windshields for the bug...There weren't that many at all to look at, but there was still the off chance that someone was selling one for scrap along the islands. “Mmn...I should get out of be--” Chiming from his phone came through, a Skype call pinging along with that oddly obnoxious tone they had. Picking the phone back up and looking at the screen, at least it was just a voice call and not a face to face call. Sighing lightly, he picked up, closing his eyes as he spoke. “Ryou's phone, who dis?”

“Oh, good. I caught you at a good time. I'm not good with time zones, and I thought that I had caught you too early.” The voice was unfamiliar. The voice itself had a very Southern accent...Oklahoma, but with a touch more Alabama mixed in. “I'm Lieutenant Aaron Barnes of the Special Affairs Section of the Galaxy Garrison.”

“Well, good morning Lieutenant. Good to know that the financial and student loan section stopped calling me.” Still laying on his back in bed, he was starting to wonder what the hell was going on. Special Affairs? He didn't even know that branch existed in the offices. “Especially at six fourty in the morning.” That only earned him a chuckle on the other's side of things, and not a true apology.

“Well, what can we say? Timing with us is just difficult. We're always either too soon, or too late, hm?” The line shifted a bit, and a bit of a dry sound could be heard from over the microphone. “I'm calling you on a secure line with classified information in regards to Takashi Shirogane.” Ryou's mouth went dry. “There was an incident the other night, and a foreign ship crashed down in the desert. Takashi was on the ship, and we were going to bring him in for interrogation, but things went sour and he's been missing in action ever since.”

It shouldn't have taken Ryou to process this new information. Instead, he sat upright in bed, hair everywhere and his clothes pressed to his body. “My brother's been dead for a year. Is this a sick joke, or are you just trying to make me hang up on you, Sir?” He almost spat the words, his eyes steely and focused on the end of his bed.

“Would I really be calling you on a secured line about a dead man or student loans, Ryou?” Well, this Lieutenant seemed to have a good case going for him thus so far. Clearing his throat, he started again. “After Takashi's appearance and disappearance, four students went missing, and we can't give any closure to the families until we know where they are.”

“Before you say anything else, let me get this straight: My twin brother, whom I thought was dead, has magically come back from the afterlife, in a space ship, crashed into the desert, and disappeared with four kids? Is this correct?” The line was silent for a moment with some uncomfortable shifting on Lieutenant Barnes' end. “Is this correct, _sir?_ ” He asked, finally getting a sigh from the other end.

“Unfortunately, yes.” He replied, shuffling around a few papers. “The worst is yet to come, though. A few of my very important friends thought of giving you a chance to seek the truth. From a quote on CCTV at the Garrison after the memorial service, the cameras caught you saying, quote: 'There's got to be more to this, it wasn't pilot error. Takashi was too good for that.', End quote.” Ryou did vaguely remember saying that, pursing his lips into a thin line.

“What's with this whole truth thing, though? There's got to be more to this, right? There's got a catch?” He was intrigued. They always had a good way of pulling people in, be it with the promise of becoming a pilot, or the fact that they had special dirt and good friends on the down-low that nobody knew about.

“The catch is, you take the latest flight to Roswell, and we'll pick you up.” Aaron stated, becoming firm in his words again. “I'll explain the rest to you, show you the security footage, and we'll discuss what will happen from there.”

This was happening all so sudden. It was like a dream. He had actually had dreams like this before, truth be told. Frowning lightly, he got out of bed. “I don't have money for a ticket. If you want me to fly out there for God knows what, I need better incentive.” Ryou fumbled to find the light switch, turning it on and off. It worked... In dreams, he found, light switches didn't work. This was real, wasn't it? It was just grounding enough for the whole situation to hit him like a ton of bricks.

“Name your price, then.” Oh, what a dangerous game.

Ryou sputtered for a moment, trying to think. He needed to know a limit. “A new windshield for a nineteen sixty four Volkswagen.” He still had his hand on the light switch, still trying to ground himself, watching as he flicked the switch up and down as he spoke.

“Done. Anything else?”

Pausing for a moment with his light switch shenanigans, he blinked. “Well, shit. I didn't think I'd get this far.” Moving away from the switch and his room, he looked around, plopping his butt down in one of the chairs in the tiny kitchenette. “...Retirement money for my parents. Something they can live on.” He suggested.

“Just tell me how many zeros to put behind the one.” Was this really how the government worked? “Look, if you're really unsure about all this, I understand. This is very sudden.”

“No shit, it's sudden—!” Ryou couldn't sit still. This was just absolutely crazy. “And what if I get there, you tell me what you've got to say, and I end up not wanting to do whatever it is you've got going on?” Bouncing his leg as he talked, he ran a hand through his hair and leaned forward.

“Well, I guess we'll pay for your parent's retirement, the sixty four Volkswagen windshield, and we'll be done. I've got plenty of other people on my list that I'd like to call about this, but I thought I'd call you first.”

“Care to enlighten me about why you'd call a drop out first?” This was becoming a lot to process. He could feel his heart beating faster, and he knew he'd have to tell his parents at some point if he agreed to whatever was falling into his lap.

“You may be a drop out and just short of graduating, but might I remind you that you scored just points away from our best pilot. Your scores for engineering and the skills test were phenomenal. You could have been an instructor with a five digit salary.” The voice on the other end of the phone sighed, pausing for a moment. “And I know that you'd be perfect for the job at hand because you want to know what happened on Kerberos more than anyone else.”

He had a point, and Ryou knew that he could have been something better than just a poor guy living on a mountainside with a bunch of scrap gear to scan the galaxies. This guy was playing his heartstrings on the right key and everything. “...I...” He started, taking a deep breath. “Give me a couple days to think about this. Maybe a week, tops.”

“That's what I like to hear.” Aaron hummed, the sound of his voice nearly purring on the other end. “If anyone asks, just say you're picking up that teaching job you always wanted. After all, you said you had an interest in teaching, right?”

“Well, yeah. Four years ago.” His blatant statement was met with a bout of light laughter from his phone. “I'm actually making a serious point here, it'd make things look sketchy.”

“What are you talking about? You got your teaching degree _years_ ago.” Aaron hummed, typing a bit on his computer. “Just let me fill in all the blanks, and I'll fill in a few more if you decide to come out and visit your old friends at the Garrison.”

“Just know, I'm not saying yes. You're basically telling me you lost my brother. Twice.” Ryou huffed, gaining back another sigh in response.

“I'll admit it, we did. Twice. I'd say have a bit of faith, but you're possibly making a big ol' jump yourself. Either way, I'll save a seat for you, but if you decline, just know I'm not waiting for any backsies.” Aaron hummed. “I s'pose I'd better let you get back to your beauty rest. Think it over. It's vague, but expect that windshield soon and the check to your parents even sooner. I'd say at least one-point-five million sounds good, right?” He didn't give Ryou much time to speak his part when he said the numbers, and he didn't quite care to know. The only sound that he was able to make was the sound of his jaw snapping shut. “I hope I hear from you real soon.”

The call dropped to silence, and Ryou was left looking at his phone with a wistful expression. They couldn't be thinking about doing what he thought they were doing. Hell, he should have just asked for them to fix up the bug itself if _that_ was what they were doing. Maybe he was thinking too far into it?

It sure as _hell_ wasn't any teaching job he had ever thought of.

The chance he was given could potentially be one of the most life changing events in his life. This could be his Kerberos...but hopefully with less supposed dead siblings and more of him coming home with Takashi.

Thinking more about it, he more so should have known that he was still out there. He had given up hope so easily, but now he had proof that he _was_ still alive, and it hit him like a ton of bricks. Maybe he should have contacted the Garrison earlier? Maybe he should have tried to fight them for the information. His mother had, upon landing at the airport. She had been screaming at the top of her lungs, 'where is he? Where is my son?!'. She was inconsolable, and then when it finally sunk in, she was quiet. It was the most damning thing. A woman who had no problem speaking her mind and telling anyone what was what, was absolutely silent, as if she too had been lost to the universe.

Pursing his lips, he continued to sit in the kitchen chair, running his hands through his hair. He had two days to think about the offer, no matter how vague it was. If he said yes to the whole thing, there was the possibility of him not returning home for a long time. His parents could lose another son.

If he said no, he'd never know what happened to Takashi and where they think he went. He'd never get the answers he wanted. He'd just go about his daily life as a second rate dropout who couldn't hold a job and continuously listened to the sounds that space had to offer.

Either way, there was no win-win to this. He'd have to lose something on either side.

 

.. .. .. .. ..

 

It was always strange for either of the Shirogane siblings to be split apart. Makoto and Jun learned that rather quickly. It either meant one was in trouble, or one was causing trouble.

There was no real sense of what was normal and abnormal when it came to the two. Building paper airplanes and sailing them off the second story balcony of their little house? Normal. Building even _bigger_ paper airplanes out of poster board, masking tape and staples? Normal. Trying to make wings out of poster board, stapels, and masking tape? They tried it once, and it resulted in a broken arm for Takashi, and a broken ankle for Ryou. After all, they had to go together to see if it would work for both of them. It didn't.

It escalated when they started to go to middle school, and they hung out with the IT guy who helped maintain all the computers in the school. He'd show them how to build computers, give them tips on robotics and everything, and sooner or later, he became their mentor. Absolutely normal. Todd Borrowman had actually graduated from one of the better colleges in on the mainland, and he moved out to Hawaii for a personal break and ended up staying.

The love for robotics ended up growing faster than expected, and the two went through parts and machines like it was their jobs. It eventually got them recognized by quite a few people when they did competitions and the like. Jun and Makoto still had some of their old robots, even if they were old and rusted together from the humidity. There was one that they had made that had two parts—One was a all terrain vehicle. It was easy to make, and there was a second part to it. It was a little transmitter that the little vehicle followed, just like a dog. Well, exactly like a dog. They even named it Rover, and they most generally used it to bring their things with them when they were walking around. It was solar powered, meaning that it was perfect for the brothers to use around the island.

That was, until they both applied for the Galaxy Garrison and got accepted, leaving him at home with Jun and Makoto. They used it around the house until it broke down, leaving it to rest in Takashi's room until he got back. Which, he never really did. Ryou's room ended up being a guest room with just bits and pieces of his old décor on the walls. Old photos in frames, a few books of his liking, an old computer that looked like a dust bunny had barfed on it. Even so, the old wood floors creaked when he walked on them the first time he came home, wearing the casuals that the Garrison supplied, his hair cut high and tight.

He didn't realize that the day he went home from the Garrison was the last day that he'd see Takashi face to face. He had dropped Ryou off at the airport, and the circumstances were bittersweet. Someone 'needed to watch over mom and dad', and he had scored just under what he needed to in order to become a pilot the week prior.

Even so, in the first weeks of being back home, someone had made the comment that there wasn't another Shirogane on the roster for tests. Takashi said it took him weeks to stop looking over his shoulder to make sure Ryou was there. The empty bunk in his room was a bit depressing.

 

_'It's just so weird for you not to be here.'_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like writing this chapter was a bit wonky, but then again, I digress. I really like the idea of Takashi and Ryou wandering around with their little robot 'dog' following them around with a little cooler on its back and the solar power panels on its back are all splayed out in order to keep everything working. 
> 
> Also, shout out to my brother Wyatt, who's been kind of a muse for the whole writing process with Ryou. (Wyatt assumes he's the family disappointment, so I draw on a bit on that.) After all, being the younger sibling is difficult, and there's always going to be someone who's better, sibling wise. Right? Even with twins. 
> 
> Not everyone can be like Takashi anyways, right?


	3. Chapter 3

_Day One_

 

The thought of it all was still baffling to him. Someone was willing to pay him to do something that he didn't know what it was, and even if he said no, they'd still pay him. Sure, the Galaxy Garrison was a place that was funded by the government and a couple military branches were funded into it as well, but the fact that they were willing to spend all that money on him was just absolutely... _disturbing_ to him. Sure, Ryou had a few self worth problems growing up, and he tried to compensate for them as much as he could, but as soon as he moved back home, that slowly faded up until now.

Now, he was thinking that he wasn't worth that much. He wasn't worth the one and a half million that his parents were going to be getting for retirement, and he wasn't worth the windshield for the Volkswagen. (He'd eventually talk about fixing the whole thing, because honestly, why not?)

But the thing was, he'd probably get reeled in. They probably had security footage since he crash landed somewhere around the campus, as told by some of the Garrison kids on Reddit. It was just a mess. Would they tell his parents? Would they find out eventually? Hell, his mother just recently got Facebook. Not because she wanted to, but some of her friends were wanting her to so that they could get a hold of her. His father, however, was more tech savvy. He'd probably show her an article or some sort of cryptid-level image that surfaced from the depths of the internet.

Sighing heavily, he held his phone in his hands as he walked back and forth, over the length of the living room. There wasn't much there, really. Just a small couch, a rug, and an old dog bed that had sat empty for some time. He had told himself he'd get a dog as soon as he left the Garrison, but he never had the time. All he wanted to watch, he could watch on his phone, and he had already sold the consoles that he and Takashi bought when they were kids.

This meant that he didn't have much to leave behind. All the tech he had was hand-me-downs and cheap from old software. He had a lot of what he had before he left, and he just re-purposed it.

The things that were keeping him on the island were his parents. He didn't have too many friends, maybe just a couple from his old jobs, but that was about it. With him being the only one around, to them, Ryou was the world. _Their_ world.

The pacing continued for a few more steps until there was a knock at his door. It made him jump out of his skin, but he quickly recovered and opened the heavy door, only to see a delivery man on the other side of the screen door. “I've got a package for a Mister Ryou Shirogane...?” The delivery man in question had behind him a massive box, labeled as 'FRAGILE' all over the place. He must have lingered too long with the answer, as the mailman sighed and gave him a weary look. “Please tell me I have the right address...”

Snapping back to reality, he nodded, opening the door for him with a quiet 'yeah', taking the clipboard that he handed over. On the delivery slip, it said that it was a windshield from an auto parts store from some obscure corner of the states, and that it had been overnight expressed. Signing at the bottom for the package, he handed back the clipboard, allowing the delivery man to leave. _Christ._

Hauling the piece of mail to the garage, opening it up as soon as he got it settled onto the wide work bench. There were all sorts of tools hanging on the walls, most of them were the traditional kind, some were smaller pieces for more high tech work. There were coils and coils of soldering wire, along with bins full of odds and ends parts. Like every bit of tech in the house, the garage was a hodge-podge of high and low tech items that he had either picked up from auctions, or closing sales for hardware and automotive stores.

Hacking at the heavy corrugated cardboard, he couldn't believe his eyes once he got it open. It was the windshield. Scratch free, glossy, and made with shatter proof glass. It was _glorious._ “My fucking god...” Within the package, there was also a packing slip with a number scrawled on it. _'Call for any other parts. You probably need more than just this, after all.'_ _AB_

Stepping back from the bench, he ran his hands through his hair and groaned. They were making it really hard to say no. Why would he need new parts if he was going to say yes? What if he never came back? This was getting to be way too much pressure for two days. God, why did he even pick up? “ _FUCK_!” He couldn't help it. The sound resounded throughout the garage, and he was pretty sure that if he were any louder, he'd rattle the blue bug. He should have made some friends. Then he'd know what to do. They could just tell him 'Well, it sounds like a good idea!' or, 'No, it's a bad idea, bad idea!'. There was no voice of reason other than his own, and even it was having a hard time deciding what he should do.

Biting his knuckle as he paced the length of the blue bug, he looked at the cracked windshield and back at the custom remake of the original. It was nice. Like... _really_ nice. And if he found Takashi and brought him back home, they could eventually be a family again, and things wouldn't be so... awkward.

But at the same time, if he too were swallowed up by the folds of space and regurgitated back onto the face of the Earth, empty handed and possibly dead on impact...

In all the universe, there were many people that this could have happened to. Why him? Why this family? Hadn't they suffered enough already? Combing his fingers through his hair again, he pulled lightly, trying to ground himself a bit.

Why the universe decided to shit on him was beyond his own thoughts, but it was doing quite a good job about doing so. After all, he could probably just replace the windshield today and think about it, and eventually he'd get an answer out, right?

His stomach growled, and he realized how late in the day it was. The clock in the shop said it was one in the afternoon, and he hadn't eaten since he got up at ten. Other than a cup of stale coffee, he was undernourished. But, he knew that he didn't have anything in the refrigerator, and all he had in the cupboard was a package of saltines, a can of tomato soup, and a couple cans of jackfruit he picked up on a whim. (Why he had it was beyond him, but he had read that one can make something good out of it.)

Outside, rain was starting to fall, the smell of the heavy air filled his lungs. It was always nice when it rained...It brought him back to simpler days, warm afternoons, and it seemed to cleanse the house of all the pent up energy from the last time it rained. Untangling his hands from his hair, he couldn't help but to be transfixed by the heavy drops hitting the ground, saturating everything it touched in a matter of moments.

Wandering closer to the entrance of the garage, he leaned against the door frame for a moment and sighed, watching the water run down the now sodden dirt road. “Maybe I should visit mom and dad...” They always knew what to do, right? And if it were a 'teaching job' he was going after, they'd give him permission to go back to New Mexico, right?

Mama Jun was still wary of the school as it was. Whenever she heard word about it, she'd get that _look_ in her eye. As if they were talking about a taboo subject, almost. Sure, they could talk about witchcraft, cannibalism, politics, and she'd be fine—she even told Ryou and Takashi to research things if they were so curious about them.

The Garrison, however, was something she didn't want to dabble with in the first place. _'I'd rather you be a fire fighter, or a police officer, or open up your own machine shop!'_ She had told them. It was only by the grace of their father that she eased up on them and let them attend the Garrison. Did that guilt still sit in his father's conscience?

Taking in a deep breath as he watched the rain, it almost made him feel a bit closer to the ground. Ever since last week when he got fired, he felt like he was slowly floating away. The stitches in his forehead were healing, he needed another haircut, and there were things changing every day.

In a world of change, there were always things that would stay the same. His parents always loved him and Takashi, and there was an undying love for both of them in their hearts. Ryou was still the younger sibling, by about five minutes, and that would never change. The ink on his shoulders were still there. Just a simple compass-like pattern with a circle in the middle. It made sense to him since it looked tribal, and the was one of the 'fly boys'. Even without the validation, it made him feel that much more badass when he looked in the mirror, flexing his biceps or not.

It was only when a low rumble of thunder came in that he was brought out of his thoughts. The clouds seemed to be breaking down, and the sky above was blue beyond the grey masses.

It'd still be messy to ride his bike down the road and into town, but as long as he brought a change of shorts or something, he'd be fine. Plus, there were still some of his clothes in his old room back home. The bike breaks themselves were an easy fix, so there was no chance of him wrecking or slamming into a pole this time.

Locking up the house before he left, he pulled out his bike and shut the garage door behind him, pedaling forward. Knowing that his mother still sometimes cooked for three people eased his mind about raiding the refrigerator at his parent's place. (After all, weren't kids supposed to supply that service after they moved out?)

In the span of twenty four years, Ryou himself had only moved two times that he remembered. Once was when he moved from his hometown to New Mexico, and then the other time was when he made it back to his hometown and into the bungalow he bought. The home he grew up in was the one that his parents lived in.

It still had that smell of dad's cooking, fresh rain and the smell of the old carpet they had in the spare bedroom. Plus, the one spot on the carpet that mysteriously smelled of lime Kool-Aid. It was always a mystery to them.

There were just too many memories to leave behind in that place. The town was hard to leave behind, too. It was just so quaint and it seemed to be forever stuck in the fifties with the old style simple design and architecture. The only things that kept them tied to the future were the fact that there were little stickers and signs in the door that advertised for free wifi and the like.

Letting himself glide down the hillside, he pedaled every so often, giving the gears a chance to catch onto the chain and pull it forward. It almost made him wish that he had a card or something to stick to his bike so that it's flap behind him with that annoying, yet ever so pleasing clacking.

With the humidity at a high again, the ride would have been a bit more pleasing if it were shorter. There were barely any mud spots on his pants from the back tire, so there wouldn't be too much of a fuss from Jun if he brought in a bit of dirt. With her being a full time mom for so long, she usually knew how to keep herself busy with things around the house.

It doesn't surprise Ryou as he's pulling into the paved driveway to see his mother beating the living hell out of a rug with her 'rug beating stick'. Well, it's the third incarnation, but nobody's going to be giving the stick a formal title, right? “Mama, please tell me you didn't haul that thing out here on your own.” Ryou frowned a bit, looking over the heavy piece of décor with a wide frown as it pulled both ends of the clothes line near the driveway. After all, it seemed that Jun was slowly getting shorter and the area rug was getting bigger.

“It wasn't moving itself, so I moved it.” The steady thwack of the rod and her words, which were driven with the movements she made. After a moment or two of Ryou standing there with the bike handles still in his hands, she stopped and wiped her brow, looking over her work before she sighed and decided it was good enough. “I regret bringing it out here, though. Your mama's getting old.” She sighed, holding her arms out as he parked the bike and leaned down for a hug.

“Not old, just smaller.” Both Jun and Makoto just hit their mid fifties—with Ryou and Takashi being born a bit later, and Jun waiting to conceive, it just meant that there was more to look out for. Especially when someone as stubborn as Jun running her own household.

Jun made a sound of displeasure as she parted, waving him off as she went back to prop the rug beating stick against the house. “What brings you down the hill today?” By the sound of it, she had the radio on and she was cooking something, along with doing meal prep for dinner. Sure, Makoto wasn't too picky about food (the only thing he truly hated was beef tongue and pumpkin),

“Well, I thought I'd come down because I have no food in my house, and I love my mama so very much that I thought I'd see her on this _fine_ day.” He watched as Jun nodded along, taking her time to step up the wooden stairs to the patio.

“And you thought you'd stay for food, but only if you help me around the house first. I'm not feeding a lazy bum.” She chided, wiggling her finger at him, just as she did when they were all younger. She taught them that if they wanted things, they had to work for whatever they were doing. Nothing was going to be handed to them right from the get-go. “We're having grilled mackerel and mushroom soup for lunch...then for dinner I'm considering just letting your papa cook. Knowing him, it'll probably be something interesting.”

Even stepping in the house, it was a bit warmer, but that was to be expected. Jun liked having the windows open, and if she wanted to get cool, she'd sit in front of the fan for a while, and then go back to what she was doing. Usually it wasn't too bad in the house, though. Sure enough, there was soup base on the stove, bubbling away along with the mushrooms she had picked up from the supermarket soaking in water, along with dried mushrooms also reconstituting quite nicely. “I miss having someone to cook for me.”

“You know what I'm going to say about that, don't you?” Jun shooed him away from the stove and pulled out pickled vegetables from the refrigerator, giving him a bit of a stern look. “You've heard it too many times to forget, Ryou.” Moving back to finely chop the mushrooms for the soup, she dumped those in, giving them time to cook until at least tender. Not too mushy or overdone.

“Either learn how to cook or find someone and settle down...” He repeated blandly, rolling his eyes to the ceiling. “I'm only twenty four, mama. I've still got a lot to do.” _'Like tell you about the job offer I got.'_ He scolded himself.

“I'm just saying, there's plenty of people here that would be lucky to have you in their lives.” Jun hummed, glancing at the clock. “Your papa should be home sooner or later for lunch...”

“I'm surprised you don't let him just eat at his job.” Ryou knew better than to say things like that. It earned him a bit of a playful scowl from Mama Jun.

“You know better. All that fried food isn't good for anyone. Not to mention the doctor said to cut down on fried foods and eat more fish and lean meats. Anything good for heart health and to lower blood pressure.”

Makoto having heart issues wasn't anything new. He actually got out of active military service due to a heart murmur, and later on in life when everything settled down with him and Jun, more issues came into play. High blood pressure, the murmur... Jun cracked down on him harder than Indiana Jones' whip on concrete. “I know, I know...Although, maybe I'll just go down to the beach shack and get some fried ice cream.” Shaking her head for the near millionth time, she pointed at the freezer.

“Don't waste your time. There's ice cream in the freezer that needs to be eaten up, but only after lunch.” She chided. “Sometimes I wonder about you.”

“How so, mama?”

Turning away from the stove, she turned off the heat and placed lids on everything for until Makoto reached the house. Leaning on the counter, she sighed, getting that sort of wistful look in her eyes. “I wonder what I'm going to do when you finally grow up.”

Ryou knew that look. She had the same look when he and Takashi graduated from pre-school, and grade school into high school, and then when they graduated high school. Although, the last of the graduations for the two Shirogane brothers actually had a few tears.

It was that look of slight fear of what the future held mixed with reminiscing and that fond feeling that wells up in the chest when thinking about how great life is. Ryou looked at the floor for a moment, pursing his lips as he thought. Maybe he should wait. After lunch would be better. Or, better yet, after supper. He'd break the news to them then, after a day of helping Jun clean. That would be fine.

“I'll get there eventually.” He nodded, getting more of that smile that she rarely gave out.

“I know you will.” Ever since Takashi went missing, both of them had seemed to soften up on Ryou and everything. They were almost more patient, treating him like he was going to break if they were too harsh on him. It wasn't like he took advantage of it by any means, but it was just so strange to see them change.

It wasn't much longer until Makoto came home, the screen door clattering as he came in. “You wouldn't believe how much of a rush we had today... I'm surprised I even got to come home-” Stopping short, his whole face lit up at the sight of Ryou. “You didn't tell me we had a guest, Jun.”

“It's hard to tell when he's coming over.” That was her cue to pick out three bowls for soup, and the same amount of rice bowls. “Set the table, please...”

“Alright, mama.” With Makoto resting for a moment and Jun plating things up, it was reminiscent of times gone by when dinner came around and Takashi and Ryou would set the table after washing their hands after a day at school and tinkering in the shop with their papa. A few side dishes on the table, with the rice cooker not too far off from the table, soup in the ceramic pot on a pot holder, the main meal in the middle. Even in the ever changing world, some things stayed the same. With everything coming to the table and being dished out, small talk came along, as usual.   
  
“So, thought you'd come down and help mom clean for food, hunh?”

“Well, yeah. After all, it gets lonely on the hill, and I've got to make sure you're both alright.” With serving everything, Ryou ended up dishing everything out, being the youngest at the table. (Besides the robots in the bedrooms—They were even younger, but none of them really had to eat, so the whole thought defeated the purpose) “Mama hauled that big rug from the living room so she could beat on it.”

Jun just shrugged her shoulders and looked to Makoto, whom gave her a faux surprised look. “Your mama? Doing something like that? Oh, I would have never thought.”

“Mind you, I've carried heavier things.” Picking up her silverware, she matter-of-factly rolled her eyes. “When I was dating your father, I was the one who picked _him_ up at the airport. _And_ I've carried you and Takashi under both of my arms when you were toddlers.”

This was new intel to Ryou, and the look on Makoto's face was something that spelled out the fact that she was telling the truth. “Seriously? I remember you hauling us around, but...You picked up...?”

“She did. I mean, I was scared to death that she was going to drop me, and all I could do was just hold on for dear life while people looked at us like we were part of the circus.” It was seldom that Makoto told lies, and the smug look on Jun's face was more than enough to confirm.

“And if I could carry that old rug, I'm sure I could still pick you up.” Ah, and they said romance was dead.

“Please don't. I don't think I want to see that.” As lunch went on, there was a bit more talk of what was going on in daily life, and what needed to be done around the house. It ended up being that Ryou would finish cleaning the rug, dust the high shelves and the trinkets in the living room, and take things into the storage up in the attic. There was a comment about hating the attic, as it was so musty and just... overall not pleasing to be in. Too many late night horror movies got to him, and the idea that the attic was unsafe really bothered him. It made his heart beat too fast, and thoughts of what may come lurking out of the shadows came to his mind.

The meal dwindled down, and as they all finished up (with Ryou snagging the last of the pickled cucumbers), the question of the hour came along. “So, did you get a call from the Garrison yet? They were saying how it was pretty urgent you call back.”

“Well, they offered me a teaching position.” _That's a lie._ “They said they don't make good teachers anymore, and since Mister Grace retired, they thought they'd call in one of their best students.” _Another lie._ He could almost hear Aaron smile in the back of his head. The anticipation of their response was making the blood rush in his ears. “I've got a couple days to mull it over and think about if I want to take it.”

“Take it.” Jun said, nearly staring right through him. “You need a job. Even if I may not like you moving back to Roswell, it's bound to happen, isn't it?” The fact that she was so stern and forward with her statement was surprising. Ryou looked to his father, getting a similar look, but less intense.

“If anyone else knows how to fly and fix things, it's you. You've even got me beat in fixing up the bug.” He admitted, shrugging a shoulder as he spoke. “If it means you can get ahead in life and start fresh, you should consider it.”

Still, the fact that he was lying to his parents stung right down to the core. It felt like he was betraying them, potentially leaving them to rot on the island they called home. Leaving family behind was never easy, and he learned that the hard way. Just the odd chance of coming home and them not being there was terrifying. “I am, believe me.” Glancing at the clock, it was almost two thirty, and the afternoon rush would probably be coming in on the beach. It was time for Makoto to head back until about dinner time.   
  
“...Ryou, why don't you walk me back to work? I'm old and feeble, and I could get heatstroke if I'm not careful.” This wasn't the normal 'Walk me back to work'. This was the 'we need to talk about something'. Ryou looked from Makoto to his mother, whom quickly adopted Makoto's shrug. He _had_ to go now.

“As long as you come back and help me with cleaning, I don't mind if you do.” She said, picking up the dishes as dishwater ran into the sink. “After all, it is still pretty humid out.” Jun wasn't being easy on him, either.

“Alright, alright...” Getting himself up from his chair, Makoto followed suit, snagging a quick kiss from Jun. Looking at them now, it was evident that they were still madly in love with each other. Some nights when he knew Jun was having a bad day, he'd bring her home flowers and something sweet for her. Hopefully they'd stay like that forever.

With the house being a bit out of the way, there was a lot of nice foliage that kept the sidewalks cool. The pavement meandered after years of not being repaired properly, and nobody really used the path besides Makoto and the occasional cyclist.   
  
It wasn't until they headed out the back screen door and got a decent ways away from the house that Makoto started talking. “You know, I got this really weird message from the bank today.” Internally, Ryou started panicking, but on the exterior, he kept his cool. “Someone had made a big deposit into the savings account. I mean, I hadn't done anything to really make that happen.” He talked a bit with his hands, waving them around a bit to keep his words going. “Then I got an email from the Garrison—Some Aaron or whatever...This is one strange teaching job, isn't it?”

“Hunh. That's _really_ weird.” Ryou stopped instantly when Makoto put a hand on his shoulder, looking to his father with wide eyes. It wasn't like he _knew_ , right? The look in his eyes made him realize that he knew something was up.

“How about we cut the crap and you tell me what about that teaching career would make someone drop a million bucks into an old man's bank account.” It wasn't often that Makoto brought out the serious side. It wasn't often that he brought out the serious face _and_ played the bad cop.

Sighing heavily, Ryou couldn't hide it anymore. He couldn't bear to lie right in his face. Not like this. “Aaron Barnes is part of some sort of special task force at the Garrison. There's something going on, and it's...” He tried to find the words for it, trying to weed out what he could. “It's really hard to explain, but I've got the chance to back out once I know what's going on. I told them that I got money for you to retire on and stuff for the blue bug, I'd consider it.”

Makoto's expression hardened and he took his hand off, shaking his head slowly. “It's always something with them, isn't it?” He asked himself, looking off into the distance, trying not to seem upset. “And what, they think they'll send you off into space, too?”

“Papa, I don't know if it's that, but-”

“Why wouldn't they tell you up front, then?” Makoto looked back at him, his dark eyes putting holes right through Ryou. “This isn't a good idea. Tell me you haven't told them yes.” The longer Ryou was silent, the more anxiety piled up. “Dammit, Ryou. I don't want to lose you, too.”

“I haven't decided on it, but I could ask for anything-”

“You can't ask for Takashi back, Ryou. Just because they're offering anything on the table doesn't mean that anything will come of it.” He was almost yelling, and the stress was getting to him. He knew this, taking a moment to calm himself down. “If you go and get yourself hurt or lost or anything, I'm sure that it'll break my heart—literally.”

He didn't want to tell him that they might have found Takashi. He couldn't. They'd be calling and they'd blow his cover. It'd be spilled all over the news. “Papa, I don't know what'll happen if I don't try. Didn't you say something like that?”   
  
His father's face hardened a bit. “...Takashi's first run to Saturn with that Holt boy and the rest of his crew.” He said softly, pursing his lips into a thin line. After a moment of staring, Makoto waved him off, starting back off on the path. “You'll do what you want anyways. I don't know what the point of asking was.”

“Papa, please...” Following after him only yielded another wave at him, and a bit of a scowl. Ryou knew he cared, and the thought of losing his last son to the endless folds of space was probably quite a lot to take in. Now he had to think of another lie to tell his mother so she didn't get nosy. Either way, she'd find out eventually, knowing her. Threading his hands through his hair, he watched for a moment as his father disappeared past the hill, taking in a deep breath.

“ _Fuck._ ”

 


	4. Chapter 4

_Day Two_

 

“ _So you're going out to Kerberos?” The static on the phone microphone shot back out through his headphones as he spoke. He knew he needed a new microphone, but he was too broke to buy one. “That's...far.”_

“ _Yeah, I know, but this is an incredible opportunity to me. We make routine trips out to Saturn and Jupiter for the ports out there. We're training people to pilot ships and make delivery runs, and we're finding new elements, Ryou. Have you ever heard of Malachidium?”_

“ _Mala what?”_

“ _You will here in the next year, I'm sure of it. And working with the Holts is amazing—I just got back from Aspen and all of us went skiing-” He was like a kid at Christmas talking to Ryou over the video call, but as soon as he caught sight of his brother's face, he stopped. “Hey, is everything alright?”_

_He couldn't help but to look into his cup noodles, dunking the freeze dried peas back into the MSG laden broth. “No, I'm happy for you. I promise.” Ryou replied, looking back up at the screen. “I'm just a bit jealous. You're gonna be hanging out with your boyfriend on a ship for another seven months.”_

“ _You realize I'm also traveling with his father. Plus...Sam's nice, I promise.” Takashi chortled, covering his mouth with his hand. “I could always set you up with one of Matt's friends.  He's got some good looking ones."_

_Ryou's eyes grew wide and he grinned widely, shaking his head. “Takashi, you wouldn't-”_

“ _I know, I know- 'I'm just not about relationships, I really don't see the appeal, and I appreciate that you've got your own and all, but it's just not for me'.” Mocking that 'cool smoulder' Ryou did, Takashi finally broke character, somber for a moment. “You know, we really miss you out here.”_

“ _...I know, but I just...” Pausing for a moment, it was like he couldn't gather the words. Guilt welled up in his chest, and it choked the words from his throat._

“ _Hey, I understand. Some people just aren't made for college. Everyone's got different learning styles, and yours is do it yourself.”_

“ _At least that's how they told us apart. You could follow directions to a T, and I had to just take things apart and put it back together.” But, it was how Ryou could make things better and improve on designs. Breaking things apart, cracking open computers, sorting everything around him so that he could change it up and make it run even faster. “You're kinda lucky that you can read directions and actually do what they say, though.”_

“ _Eh, but that limits me in the long run.” Takashi hummed, checking the time on his phone. “Hey, it's getting pretty late. It's even later back home, isn't it?”_

“ _Nah, we're still three hours behind you. It may be ten over there, but it's still seven or so.” Ryou shrugged. “...I really hate time zones.”_

“ _You'll probably hate them more when we're out past Saturn. There's no real way to gauge time out there since there's no sun.”_

_Ryou groaned and tilted his head back, looking back at Takashi with a wider frown. “You'd better not call me at six in the morning with your 'goodmorning, sunshine' shit. I couldn't handle it when we were kids, and I can't handle it now.”_

“ _Would you rather me sing mom's 'good morning' song?”_

_The conversation disintegrated into laughter and more talking about memories and past events that made them who they were. The conversation ended with another 'I'll miss you'._

At least there wasn't a sour note to leave things on.

 

… .. … .. … .. … ..

 

Pacing back and forth again, he looked at the job he had done. The windshield looked _nice_. It wasn't like he'd be able to make any more adjustments for the time being, but it was tempting to call and ask for more to help him decide. Gnawing at his thumb nail, he looked at the headlights. They were okay, but they looked pretty dim. He couldn't drive too far at night with them on or off. The doors had rust on them, and the trim and fenders needed to be replaced. Well, not really needed, but it would be nice if he had a shiny new one of each to put on.

But on the other side of things, they couldn't win him over with talk of car parts and promises of money to his parents. If Makoto had his way, he'd give it all back. He was terrifying when he was angry—if it were justified anger, he was furious. This...he didn't know how this whole situation would further provoke him. He was all they had left of Takashi besides his untouched room and a lifetime of memories.

But at the same time, it was getting tiring to know that they remembered him by looking at Ryou's face. If he took this opportunity, he could make a name for himself. Ryou Shirogane: Hero of the Universe. He wasn't just going to be the shadow of the Garrison's 'Golden Boy' if he actually succeeded. But then again, did anyone else know about this little deal? Everyone was keeping it all on the down-low, not bothering to say anything to news reporters, journalists...Not even to the Buzzfeed people. And _they_ wormed their way into _anything_.

But did he really want fame? Still the thought of risk and danger got to him, poking in all the right places for insecurities and fear. Stopping his pacing in the middle of the bug, he almost prayed for some sort of poltergeist to hit him and just end it all for him.

Already, the afternoon rain had started up again, bringing that familiar scent in. After yesterday, he was surprised that his mother hadn't come running up the hill to yell at him for potentially taking such a risky opportunity. Or, Makoto could have kept it secret from her even longer than he expected. Either way, he was potentially taking a teaching job that kept his family from talking to him. Potentially.

The words Makoto said the day before stuck with him, and they stung to the core. _'You'll do what you want anyways.'_ He was right, though. He would do as he pleased, no matter what happened. It just didn't help that he was being guilted by the idea of leaving his parents behind. It was bad enough that moving to New Mexico brought forth weekly calls from his mother and his father sending him 'hip and cool' memes and jokes off of the internet.

Grumbling loudly, he finally stormed back into the house, putting his phone on the counter as he rummaged around the kitchen for food. Mixed fruit, black beans, diced tomatoes in a bloated can, an open pack of slimy, molded hot dogs in the refrigerator, ice in the freezer, along with a bowl of bacon grease that had been put in so that he could throw it out later. There was always the jackfruit in the cupboard, but he didn't have barbeque sauce to drench it in. Groaning loudly, he felt like he couldn't go to his parents again for food. Pacing around the kitchen, his stomach growled.

“Maybe they're all psychic reptile aliens over there and they know when to pick on people to make them do what they want.” Ryou mumbled, looking at his phone. There was a message via Skype. _'Missed Call from: Aaron Barnes'._ It had been two days, hadn't it? Groaning, he shook his head and kept looking. He must have accidentally silenced his phone anyways. He needed some more time to think. Jasmine rice. That would have to work. Grabbing a pan from the dish rack, he measured out a cup, two cups of water, and set that on the stove to come to a boil. He was impatient, and cooking wasn't quite his forte. It was always mix and match with Ryou, just like how he did his mechanical jobs. There was salt and pepper on the stove, which would probably have to do. He'd be eating carbs for a couple days if he couldn't find anything else to eat. Nothing came to mind.

As the water slowly started to bubble, he was figuring out how much money he actually had. His last paycheck was only about one hundred fifty dollars. That was almost two weeks ago, and he was sure that Mister Kahale wasn't going to pay him for the last stunt he pulled. There was fifty for the internet, fifty for the money he owed to his parents, twenty five at the 'Scratch and Dent' store for groceries two weeks ago... He had twenty five dollars to his name.

The ringing of his phone sent him almost a foot in the air as he was jolted from his thoughts, staring at the call screen. _'Call from: Aaron Barnes'_. “You're really fucking persistent, aren't you?” Ryou grumbled, hanging up the call before it could even go to voicemail. Chucking a lid onto the rice as he turned down the heat, he looked at the pair of missed calls. He shouldn't really be doing such a thing. He could easily become bored of Ryou and look for someone else to eject into space for all he knew. Pacing the kitchen (he was realizing that pacing was his thing—all that nervous energy had to go somewhere, right?), he watched as the screen lit up again, same thing. _'Call from Aaron Barnes'._ This time, he picked up, his jaw clenched as he spoke. “You're persistent, aren't you?”

“Well, you know us. We wanna be as punctual as possible with deadlines, and you sir, have met yours.” Aaron hummed, the smile in his tone evident as ever. “So what's it going to be? I need an answer and you're the only one who can give it.” The sound of the other's southern twang was starting to get to him. It was almost annoying, really.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he closed his eyes, trying to seem like he wasn't pressed for time. “I thought I said a week, tops.”

“We're running on a tight schedule, boy.” Aaron sounded like _he_ was having a bad day, too. “I've got people wanting you in Roswell by tomorrow evening.”

  
This was really pressing him to the wall, and Aaron knew this. Biting his tongue, he stared, trying to think. “And I'm still able to decline when I get there, right?”

“Yes, indeed.” Aaron hummed, the sound of his fingers tapping on his desk audible over the call. It was now or never, and he needed to make a split decision. He couldn't wait any longer. No more holding back, right?

Sighing heavily, he doubled over and pinched the bridge of his nose, eventually crouching down in a squatting position. “I have two questions. What airport do you want me to fly out of, and if I give you a list when I get there, will you send parts to my place and send someone to maintain my place? I also want to get a good paycheck after all of this if I end up coming home.” A good cushion would be nice, really. He was worried about what he'd leave behind. He didn't want to be too much of a burden to his parents.  
  
The sound that Aaron made over the phone was almost a purr. “Just go to the one closest to you. Give me a name, I'll get the ticket for the flight, and send it to you.” He said, that Southern charm oozing from the phone. “I really think you'll be eager to take this job we're offering. I can't really say much more without spilling the beans.”

“Yeah, I kind of figured that out.” Finally rising from the crouched position, frowning at the burnt rice in the pot. “There'd better be in flight food.”

“Aww, don't worry about that. We'll treat ya real nice. After all, you're suddenly my _favorite_ pilot.” The sound of his voice accompanied by the purr in his tone was almost enough to make Ryou want to throw the phone.

“I've got to pack, and I'll be at the Big Island Airport on Sixth and K Avenue. Give me an hour, tops.” Ryou said firmly, listening to the keyboard clack away. “...I've got to say something to my parents first. Make it two hours.”

“Alrighty, then. I'll send that boarding pass to you, and you'll be set to go. Plane leaves in three hours, and there's a good seat waiting for you.”

“Good to know.” Ryou said quietly, hanging up the phone before tossing it to the kitchen counter, watching the last of the water bubble up and out of the pot. Steam hit the dome and rattled the ill fitting lid. It was probably burnt on the bottom, and he only had enough time to pack and say goodbye.

Makoto knew what was going on. It was something dangerous, and he didn't like it. Did Jun know, though? It'd break her heart if she knew what was going on. She'd beg and plead for him to stay and not to go out and do something dangerous. Sighing heavily, he turned off the stove and tossed the pan of burnt rice in the sink and ran some water into the pan. Grabbing a sheet of notebook paper and a loose pen and started scrawling.

_Mom and Dad,_

_I'm sorry I didn't tell you that I'm leaving. It came up so suddenly and I didn't know what to say to you. I know you both don't like the fact that I'd be going back to New Mexico, and I don't want to leave you behind._

_I've made a deal with someone in order to keep myself and you both supported. Anything I ask for, I'll have, and that means that I'd have you two covered. I already asked for your retirement to be paid off so you two can live comfortably, and if something happens, I'll have a safety net for that, too._

_I don't know what I'll be doing, nor do I know how things will fall, but I promise you, I'll come home. If not, I love you more than you know, and I don't mean to hurt you by not saying this to your faces. I promise you, I'll be home._

_Sincerely,_

_Ryou Shirogane_

 

… .. … .. …

 

“ _You know, I've never actually met Matt in person. What's he like?” It was another one of those nightly calls after Ryou left the Garrison, sharing dinner, even if it was late for Ryou. Stirring up the cup noodles he had, dinner was a college student's dream. Fried spam, cup noodles, and a cheap tapioca pudding for dessert. Perfect._

“ _Oh, well...” Shiro's own Indian takeout was somewhat in view, leaving Ryou to envy a bit of what his brother had. Then again, that happened quite a bit these days. “He's really, really nice. He said he started out building his own computers and doing mathletics as a kid, and eventually he worked himself up into college level classes at the age of fourteen. That kid's a genius.” The way Takashi talked about him, Ryou knew that look in his face all too well. “He's trying to study cosmic dust and how the universe was created, how big it is, how far it goes...”_

“ _Basically he wants to know the secrets of the universe, right? He's kinda going in the same footsteps as Doctor Holt.” Dunking the freeze dried vegetables in the broth, he tilted his head a bit, arching an eyebrow as he did so. “So, what do you think of him? I mean...He's been there a bit longer than you, but he's younger by a year...So technically he's your superior.”_

“ _Yeah, but he's really not interested in being senior officer just yet. Especially since that would mean he'd have to leave his lab that he's settled into.” Takashi sighed, glancing at the camera for a moment. “What's that look for?”_

“ _What's_ that _look for? You're doing the thing!”_

“ _What thing?” Takashi was trying to play unaware that he was making that 'I'm thinking of someone special' face. “I'm not doing the thing, Ryou.”_

“ _Oh, you are too. Come on, how often do you think of Matt as 'more than a friend'?” Watching as Takashi's reserve crumbled, he grinned widely and watched as his brother slowly put his hands over his face. “Oh my god.”_

“ _Just—Don't say anything to mom or dad. I don't know how they'd react.” He said quietly, peeking through his fingers. “Mom's always said that she wanted me to settle down with someone nice and always hinted at girlfriends and everything, but...” Ryou was hearing this for the first time, setting down his cup noodles and folded his hands over his mouth. “I think I really like Matt more than any girl I've dated, Ryou.”_

_Ryou himself knew that he himself was pretty ace, and relationships never really struck him as something he wanted in life. Being the way he was, he wasn't really surprised with Takashi's revelation. “I'm sure mom and dad wouldn't be offended. You're their favorite anyways. They think that the sun shines wherever you step.”_

“ _Still...” Takashi sighed and ran his hands through his hair, looking off to the side. “I just...I don't really think I've ever been really straight, but I'm not over the top gay or anything...” He mused. “I'm sorry, this is really weird to talk about.”_

“ _Don't worry about it, 'kashi. Ma and Pa love us no matter what. All that matters is that whoever you date or marry or whatever can cook.” The sudden laugh from the other end of the call caught Ryou off guard. “What?”_

“ _I-I'm sorry, but...I don't think mom would actually like that...Matt can't cook for shit. We'd both starve!” Takashi gasped, that wide grin back on his face._

“ _Oh my god...it's all going to be Indian takeout for both of you, isn't it?” Ryou snickered. From then on, there was somewhat of a new respect for each other. Sure, they both knew either of them like the back of their hands, but even in the little wrinkles of their palms, there were new facts that they learned about each other._

_It wasn't until Takashi stared having Matt over for their evening dinner calls that Ryou finally met Matt and started talking to him from time to time. He seemed nice. Just the perfect amount of nerdy and smart to work with Takashi's somewhat dry humor and sarcasm. He was glad that Takashi found someone that he could be with and finally have someone that loved him just the way he was._

 

_.. .. .. .. .. .._

 

The ride from his place to the airport ate up the last bit of money he had to his name. For now, all he was worth was determined by the things he had in his name. The rickety old house he lived in, all the computer hardware he had. So, essentially, he was worth half a PB and J, and a lousy handjob. Walking through the airport, he had just enough to clothe himself for a week, maybe longer if he kept the spare change for a laundromat. All of it was packed into a duffel bag, and sent through the X-Ray machine at the TSA station, along with his wallet and shoes.

He knew he was walking through the airport in a daze. It just wasn't registering that he was going through with all of this. So far, he hadn't gotten a call from his parents yet about why he wasn't home. Was Makoto still angry with him? What did he think about what was going on? Did Jun know what was going on? She'd be furious if she knew that her son was doing something potentially risky.

Even so, as soon as he connected to the airport wifi, Aaron's messages started coming through, along with an email about the plane tickets being confirmed, along with the boarding pass information in one link.

 _'You've got your flight waiting for you. Here's your information and everything. See you in a few hours!'_ “What a load...” Ryou murmured. Honestly, he wished he had money for cigarettes. Sure, he didn't smoke, but according to his father, they took the edge off of things like hunger and moods. And to be honest, Ryou needed quite a few cigarettes for that.

The kiosks at the terminals were selling good looking foods, and even the candies in the faux metallic wrappers looked good. _'I'd kill for a snickers'_ ran through his mind, shaking his head as he puttered around with his phone a bit more. Going through old photos on Facebook, running through his tumblr likes. There was a Harlem Shake video on one of the blogs he followed that a bunch of students did, landing them on the local news.

More instagram photos, more posts directed at him about his loss and everything, narrowing his eyes a bit more at everything. The more he looked at them with the new information he had, the more he felt anger swell in his chest. How couldn't they say something to his mother? She had her heart broken once, and she needed to know that he was still okay. What about those four kids that went missing, too? Didn't their parents deserve to know? He hadn't heard anything about it, so they were still keeping things hush hush.

When being angry didn't suit him anymore, he locked his phone and crammed it in his pocket, holding his duffel bag close. Staring at the ceiling as the chatter over the intercoms went on, he closed his eyes for a moment and breathed. He knew he got himself wound up so badly that it didn't feel good, and he knew that was one of his flaws. Being the more feisty out of the two of them, it used to be Takashi that held him back from flat out annihilating whoever thought to insult them. At least, that was when they were kids. It was almost a left brain – right brain sort of situation. Two sides of the same coin. At least, that was what some thought.

“ _Now boarding: Flight 315 from Big Island International Airport to Garrison International South of Roswell. Please allow all attendees with premium access or accessibility aids to board first to make the boarding process faster for everyone.”_

“Well, that's me...” He murmured, pulling up the boarding pass. Sure enough, there was a gold star by the barcode they'd scan to allow him to board. That meant something, right? Wandering up to the counter, he let them scan his phone, getting a bit of an odd look. “Something wrong?”

  
“No, it's just...You've technically got _Diamond_ Member access here...” Rummaging around for a moment, one of the agents handed him a slip of paper with writing on it. “Just give this to one of the hostesses and we'll do our best to take care of you for the flight.” It was an overnight flight after all, and from the looks of it, he was getting his own sleeping area, free meal, all the booze he could ask for, breakfast... With this sort of power, Ryou was almost worried that they were afraid of him because of the privilege he had been given. “Enjoy your flight, Mister Shirogane.”

Still, he felt like this was so alien. Walking forward with the slip in hand, as soon as he stepped foot onto the craft, he gave it to one of the hostesses, whom got him settled in his own seat. It was all so lavish...He didn't have anyone that bumped his seat or rubbed shoulders with him, or anything that bothered him. Already, they were asking him if he wanted fillet mignon or the salmon for dinner, and what kind of wine he'd like to pair with either of those. All of which was compliments of Lieutenant Aaron Barnes, respectively.

“Shit...” He murmured, pressing his hand over his mouth as he mentally pondered over the whole situation. Was he really worth all of this? Sure, he understood the money for his parents, they were irreplaceable. He understood the windshield for his car. Right. But being treated like the goddamn President on a plane with all the best food available on the flight. Well, at least he was getting fed, and he'd be able to snack on all the peanuts he wanted to and get the best wifi on the plane. He could watch all those youtube videos he had been meaning to watch...

He'd be finding out what they had in store for him sooner or later. He'd have the choice to agree or disagree to whatever they were doing, and if anything else, he could go back to his old life, living on whatever he could find. Or, he could make a name for himself. He could finally be 'Ryou Shirogane' rather than 'Takashi's Brother'.

Maybe he'd be able to step out of the hole his brother left on this Earth and make his own. Maybe he'd be his own person after all of this. Maybe they'd think more of him and finally stop comparing him to what was left behind.

All of this bounced around in his mind through the night meal and the dimming of the overhead lights as they took off. With only ocean below them and heavens above, Ryou was still unsure what to think about the imminent changes in his life. For now, all that he could do was wait, and see what this new turn of events had in store for him.


	5. Chapter 5

“ _You know, it's pretty hard to get around here.” Looking at the schedule he was given, all the rooms were so far spread out. “This campus is huge, and it just...”_

“ _I know, Ryou, I have most of your same classes.” Takashi sighed, looking at his own schedule. It was the first week of schooling, and they were slowly getting used to the layout of the school, and learning how to get to all the different classes they had. “The only things we don't have together are things we picked on our own. I did Piloting II since I tested out of the first training.” After all, they both did know how to fly a plane. It was one of those things that they both picked up on a whim, and Takashi was exceptionally good at piloting to begin with._

_  
“Advanced Engineering.” Ryou sighed, navigating his way past a few people crowding the halls of the dorm areas. “I'm taking both Advanced and Basic so I can at least get some double credits so I can go on to the Freeform Engineering class...I could build my own things and not have to play grease monkey for the whole year. It's like they don't know we can do our own stuff. We've been doing this since we were little.”_

“ _You have a point.” Having been given their room at their request to stay together, they were both heading to the same place to begin with. “So, I might have made a new friend today.” Opening up the door to their dorm, he wandered in first, the younger sibling following suit._

“ _Oh yeah? I didn't think you'd have it in you to actually strike up a conversation.” Ryou hadn't gotten that far in friendship making, but he was glad, none the less, that Takashi was making an effort more than himself. The dorm room itself was decorated with minimal effort, save for the few hung pictures of hand drawn diagrams and to do lists on either sides of the walls._

“ _Mm-hm. He's one of the older pilots in my class, but he's knowledgeable and he knows what he's doing. He helps Iverson run the simulations and all, so he's been giving me tips on how to study and practice.” He explained, putting his bag of books down on the floor with a loud 'thnk', simultaneously plopping himself into his desk chair. “Overall, I think he's pretty neat.”_

“ _Good to know you've got someone to look up to. You know, the whole mentoring thing would suit you when you get up there in the ranks. You're so level headed and such an old fart on the inside.” Ryou snickered, plopping his own bag down, but his made more of a 'clinking' noise. The look on his sibling's face was enough to ask 'what the hell was that', prompting him to pick the bag back up and empty it out onto his desk. Spare and loose parts fell out of the bag, the bolts rolling around in circles. “...I may have brought some things back to the room.”_

“ _Ryou, they said on the first day to not have any sort of equipment off of campus.” Takashi groaned, rubbing his temples already. “I know we're in the dorms, but it qualifies as 'off campus' since we're not technically in the school building.”_

“ _Look, I can't just keep busy by reading a book or studying. It doesn't work for me like that. I've gotta keep my hands busy while I read.” Ryou argued._

“ _What about that fidget thing you made? The one with the old d-pad and the control stick from the old game console?”_

“ _I left that at home.” He grimaced, watching as Takashi tilted his head back and groaned. “Don't do that, you know how I get when I can't do things. It makes me anxious, and I can't stand it.”_

“ _I know, I know...” Running his hands through his hair, Takashi sighed and looked at the parts on his desk. “Just...don't tinker around too much. If it keeps me up at night and you're not doing what your supposed to, I'll personally hand you over to the dean and the Matron head of the dorms.”_

“ _Is that a threat or a promise?” Ryou grinned, holding out a hand with the pinky outstretched._

“ _Oh, it's both.” Returning the gesture, they linked fingers in a tight pinky swear, pulling apart soon after. “And if it's anything cool, you'd better show me.”_

“ _Everything I make is cool, 'kashi. I thought you'd know that by now.”_

 

_.. -..-. .-- .. .-.. .-.. -..-. ..-. .. -. -.. -..-. -.-- --- ..-_

 

The sound of the plane around him had been just enough to get him to sleep. The hum of the engines and the air rushing past them made for beautiful white noise. If it weren't for the fact that he was sleeping so oddly with himself folded over in half, it would have been a better sleep. Instead, his back was sore and his head hurt from the lack of water he had been denying himself.

“ _Good morning, this is Captain Hartman speaking, chiming in to tell you that on this beautiful morning, we will be landing at our destination. The forecast for the Garrison International South of Roswell for today include sunny weather with a high of one hundred degrees, that's about thirty eight for y'all you using Celsius. The stewardesses should be coming around soon with breakfast meal, coffee, and other refreshments. Trash will be collected at this time.”_

The captain went on with his announcements, making Ryou wish that he could just go back to sleep. The meal he had been given last night was fantastic. He couldn't remember a time when he had actually eaten that well. But, given the circumstances, it did make his stomach ache and protest after the amount of food he had consumed.

There was still ocean all around them, and the ghostly image of land on the horizon came into view. They'd be going over California sooner or later, then Arizona, then New Mexico. The stewardesses came around, as told by the pilot, offering coffee. It was probably just some cheap commercial blend that one would find at a truck stop, but the smell of it, along with the possibility of at least a granola bar was tantalizing. “Good morning, Mister Shirogane.” He still couldn't get over the fact that they greeted him like he was the Prime Minister of Canada. Snapping back to the aisle where the food cart was, one was holding a tray with goodies on it. “Since you weren't awake to pick what you wanted for the morning meal, we thought it'd be best to just offer what we have here. Is that alright?”

God, he was not used to this. Looking at the plate with the food on it, he knew it was too much. A slightly bulging omelette and what looked like a hassleback-cut tomato with goat cheese oozing out the side. With that, there was granola and yogurt, and a cup of hot coffee on the side. “Yeah, that's fine,” He started, bringing out the jumbo sized tray for himself. “I haven't actually eaten a good breakfast in _years._ ”

“Well, that's really unfortunate. Hopefully this'll constitute for the missed years.” One of the stewardesses was a brunette with freckles and a familiar accent. She was from the south, wasn't she? That brought back the thought of Aaron, and why he was even on this plane to start with. “Cream and sugar for your coffee?”

“Nah, I'll take it black...” He nodded, picking up the heavy silverware and poked at the food, not sure if he should really eat or not. Sure, it was a meal and all, but would it really set well with him? The whim of 'what the hell' finally crossed his mind as he eventually ate the food given, realizing that it was just sub-par airplane food and decent coffee. Nothing too good or bad about it, just...the usual. But, that in mind, it haunted him later.

After a couple more hours of sitting around and trying to find a decent movie to watch before their descent, the coffee and omlette was rolling around in his stomach with seemingly murderous intent, along with the tomato and cheese dish. He figured it just nudged up the acidity of his stomach contents.

Nerves was also becoming an issue with him, and he resorted to toying around with a pen he had in his bag, popping the cap on and off as he thumbed through the plane's movies. Atlantic Rift, Transmorphers, Finding Nimbo, Man-He and Rashee...They really didn't have good taste, did they?

_They found him, though._ Ryou thought, the quiet clicking of the pen cap was starting to calm him down, thankfully. He would have been tinkering if it weren't for the lack of parts on his lap tray. _He's out there, and he's alive..._ How did he manage to get back, though? There was some sort of craft he was on that crashed into the desert. And how did students get pulled into this?

The churning in his stomach got worse as the initial descent was announced after a while, the centripetal force seeming to make his stomach move, and the contents did as well. Swallowing it all back down, he knew there were barf bags, but he couldn't do that to the flight attendants. They were too nice.

The desert below was painted burnt sienna, in color, and the airport below them was about the size of the Galaxy Garrison to begin with. What the airport had with width, the Garrison had with upper levels and different layouts. Ryou remembered that when he was there, there was so many flights of stairs... It almost killed him his first week there.

His only carry on was up above him in the overhead compartment, all his belongings crammed into one bag. So, if he really needed to get off the plane quickly, he could. As they came closer and closer to the pavement, he found himself gripping at the armrests, as if that would help his troubled guts and tired mind. Usually, he flew better than this. He _enjoyed_ flying. That was how he got himself into all of this in the first place. It was astounding what a small problem like an upset stomach could present.

As the wheels bumped against the ground, he closed his eyes and tilted his head back, trying to keep everything down. Ugh...this was absolutely terrible...they couldn't fly any more gentle, could they? The overhead lights finally came back on as they were taxing along, and the flight attendants had started going through their landing protocol. Still clicking his pen, he had his eyes closed and was trying to breathe.

“ _Alright, passengers. We've finally landed in Roswell at Garrison International Airport South of Roswell. Please make sure to pick up any debris you've left at your seats, and make sure to check under and above your seats for all your luggage. Thank you for flying with us today, and we hope you enjoy your time in Roswell!”_

Yeah, sure. Enjoy. Coming to a stop, his stomach luched and settled back to where it should be, prompting him to get up and get off the plane as soon as possible. He was one of the first off, being beat out by a woman with two kids on a monkey leash. One was in front, the other hanging behind and bawling due to not having enough sleep. He knew he himself probably looked like hell warmed over, and his hair was messy and gross with overnight sleep and excess oils. It looked different from three years ago, having grown out up top, and turned into a sideswept undercut. The new pinkish scar from the previous injury on his forehead stood out against his lightly tanned skin, and his shirt and jeans were crumpled from sitting for too long. The only thing that seemed to not hold a grudge against him was the worn out flannel shirt he had put on during the flight to keep himself warm.

Right outside the gate and in the lobby of the airport, there was a party of two waiting for him, with a sign held out that read _'Welcome back, Ryou Shirogane!'_ They were both dressed in Garrison formal wear, like they were going to a high ranking gathering. He recognized one of them was dressed as a private—possibly someone training to become a higher ranking. Either way, this young adult looked terrified next to the man with all the decorations of a Lieutenant General. The name tag on the taller man read 'Barnes'. He could only imagine who it was.

“Well, I'm surprised you didn't bring your uniform.” Aaron called, the tone of his voice giving him away. Over the calls, Ryou imagined he was some Colonel Sanders look alike, but he wasn't too far off. He had dusty blonde hair that was cut into one of the acceptable styles of the higher ranks—a bit longer on the top, cut down and faded along the sides, and swept to the side for a classic 'Captain America' look, and a longer face, more oval in shape than rectangle. In terms of body shape, he looked like he worked out regularly, but was settling into a marriage with the Garrison snack bar. Sporting a goatee and a well taken care of mustache, he really did look like he sounded. He seemed like he could easily pass for a 'Pastor's Kid' if he tried enough. Piercing green eyes met his own, not shaking him a bit. “You look worse for wear, though.”

Coming closer, Ryou felt his breakfast move again, making him nearly gag. “Your hospitality on the plane made me sick.” He groaned, trying to keep himself upright. The younger subordinate frowned a bit, opening their mouth for a moment.

“Lieutenant General Barnes, don't you think we sh-”

Finally, everything had sat in his stomach for too long, and it all came up and onto the floor. It was a bit of a scene, and everything that came up looked disgusting, Aaron frowned widely with just a hint of worry, while the younger Garrison officer watched in horror. Ryou gagged and sputtered, but nothing else came, but at the same time...he felt much better. Finally bringing himself upright, he tried to brush off the fact that he just vomited at a high ranking officer's feet and scared the hell out of his apprentice. “Mister Shirogane, you have a way with words.” Aaron chuffed, shaking his head slowly. “You just couldn't contain your enthusiasm.”

 

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“I don't expect you to really want to do much. From what was said at the airport, the flight didn't suit you well...Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if anyone else on the plane got food poisoning.” They were riding along in one of the stereotypical black sedans. The dry heat of the desert wasn't too bad, but Ryou had found himself sweating as soon as he took a step outside. It was much different from what he was used to. There, it was humid. Here, it was just unrelenting sun heat.

Sipping on a bottle of club soda from the vending machine, Ryou could feel himself grow more and more tired as he sipped. He must not have really slept well, hunh? “I appreciate that. Besides nerves and the bad eggs, I think I'm done for today.” He groaned lightly, setting the can down to rub circles into his temples with his fingertips. They were cool from the bottle, giving him a chance to relax. “I do have some questions, though.”

“I'm sure you do. Mind you, the car is secure, and my lips, along with my shadow here, are sealed.” Aaron hummed, crossing one leg over the other. Somehow, the car itself was set up with swivel seats behind the driver's. So, Ryou got the back of the back seat to himself, while L.C. Barnes got his own, along with his young colleague.

“Have you had any other contact with Takashi and the students that went missing? Have you even _tried_ to send messages?” He needed to know if there was anything that he could find out. Hell, he'd settle for mysterious smoke signals.

“Since they left in an unidentifiable flying object, no. It...You're going to have to see the footage to believe it. But before, when Takashi had been pulled from the wreckage of the vehicle he crashed in and then went missing again, there were a couple transmissions we caught sight of when scanning the area. One was of him upon contact with the atmosphere, broadcasting that he was coming in for a landing.” He started, pulling out his phone. “Then, we heard this over the stations. None of us use this code anymore. I personally don't use it, and it's been eons since anyone's really studied it.”

A series of taps played from the phone. It took a moment, but then it hit him like a bunch of rocks. “I need a piece of paper.” Ryou interjected, taking the phone from him, along with the poster board from the sign at the airport. Pulling out his pen, he started the recording over, pressing it to his ear. It was embarrassing. Not many people used this brand of code anymore, since sailing by ship had become obsolete since there were budget planes and they were working on other forms of travel. It had been long forgotten, saved only by history books and word of mouth...er...tap.

Jotting down the letters, he worked quickly, trying to get it all in one fell swoop.

RYOU | SHIROGANE

TAKASHI | IS | ALIVE

WILL | LEAVE | MESSAGES

USE | DOT | SLASH | CODE | J

SEE | YOU | SOON

With all that written down with a couple of listens through, Ryou was stunned. He remembered all that code stuff they came up with as kids? Sure, they had found one of those old books about the Titanic, and picked up Morse code just for the sake of things and the fact that it was a near dead language. “From the sounds of it, he used some sort of short wave radio and...” Listening again, he frowned deeply, looking down at his hand. “It sounds like he's tapping with a spoon or something.”

“That's no spoon, that's for sure.” Aaron huffed, arching an eyebrow. This piqued Ryou's interests.

“What do you mean? You're going to have to fill me in on this.”

L.C. Barnes sighed and pulled out a tablet after Ryou finally gave his phone back. “Alright. When your brother crashed the craft into the desert, our first responders were already out there because we were getting long range transmissions. The technology on that ship was nothing we had ever seen before.” He was showing pictures of mangled ships, one of which looked absolutely foreign. Far beyond their own technology. “And, your brother came back with his own souvenirs from being out there.” A blurry image of a man showed up on screen. It threw Ryou right into the gulf of uncanny valley. Skin tight clothing and rags hung off of him. The first thing he noticed was the face. It was Takashi, but there was a deep scar across his face. Then he saw the arm. Metallic and glinting in the evening light, his other hand over his eyes to avoid the bright flood lights.

“Is that...”

“We assume it was a prosthetic, but he became combative and we had to sedate him. Shortly after, someone else came by and abducted him. That's when the four Garrison students got involved.” The images of the students came up, identified by their school ID. Lance McClain, Hunk Garret, Pidge Gunderson, and Keith Kogane. “The Kogane boy was expelled for reasons; disorderly conduct, disobeying direct orders...he was a pain in the ass, so I've heard. Your brother had tried to mentor him one to one before he was escorted off of campus.” Takashi never talked about Keith. Looking closer at the image, he frowned. Had he been trying to fill a void there, or...? Because hell, Keith was right there in uncanny valley with Takashi's new look. “We're also looking into the identity of the student 'Pidge Gunderson'. Upon looking at records, they had been hacked by an outside source, and everything was false, right down to the Social Security Number. Everything, from the name to the numbers, was fake.”

“Well, who the hell is this gremlin?”

Sighing heavily, Aaron almost didn't want to answer it. It was almost like he was embarrassed that his school had been hacked by someone so young looking. “We believe that this character may be Katie Holt. She had already been apprehended and expelled with no chance to return after she snuck in and dug up files on the Kerberos mission. It wasn't pilot error, it was something else entirely. There was a bit of footage that the cameras on the original craft took. The audio quality is coming right from their microphones, and the camera feed cuts out at some point, but this will give you an idea of what happened.”

Handing the tablet to Ryou, he looked it over. The gritty voices sounded familiar. Takashi's made his heart stop cold, watching as the camera fizzled for a moment, jumping to a different point of view. A massive craft loomed above them, the sound of crashing and rubble came through the speakers, along with screaming before the camera feed cut out entirely. “They...What the hell was that?” More fear was bubbling up in Ryou's chest, more than the anger in the back of his mind. “What the _hell_ was that?!”

“What does it look like to _you,_ Ryou?” Aaron's expression had grown hard, crossing one leg over the other as he spoke. “We believe that the first time, Matthew Holt, Samuel Holt, and Takashi Shirogane were abducted by an unknown alien race. We don't know what they are, who they are, and how many they are. Takashi returned to Earth on unknown circumstances before being kidnapped by a different party with this craft.” Reaching over to tap the screen, another video played, caught by a cellphone. The quality was awful, but from the looks of it, this craft was a giant mechanical lion. “That, we can't explain. Even _I_ don't know what the hell it is.” Looking at Ryou with an arched eyebrow, he noted the other's face pale. “You're not going to throw up again, are you?”

“N-No, sir.” He breathed, handing the tablet back. “It...It's just so much to take in...” Pursing his lips, he breathed, clicking his pen again. “So...there's aliens and flying lions out in space? What next, are we going to find monsters at the bottom of the ocean?” Ryou teased, stopping as soon as he saw Aaron's serious expression. “There's...not monsters at the bottom of the ocean, are there?”

“If there were, that's the least of our problems.” Aaron explained. “We've got more scientists out there than we do in the ocean. Kerberos was supposed to be an exploration mission into the creation of the universe as we know it.”

“Well, then what the hell am I doing here? This really seems like a you problem thus so far.” Ryou crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for him to say what he was doing here in the first place.

There was a bit of a hard silence, and the looming image of the Galaxy Garrison Academy came into view. “We want you to try and find them. Their families are going to find out eventually, and for the sake of everyone, I want you to bring them home. Colleen Holt doesn't need to lose another child, and the others don't deserve to lose theirs in the same way.” Aaron's expression softened a bit as he spoke. This was heavy in his hands, wan't it? “We've got a signature on the lion craft, and we've been looking at the small pod's systems. We've got it working for us, and our software is running in it. You'll have to see it for yourself—it's an engineer's dream. It's running on some sort of fuel that never runs out, and it's incredible.”

“That's impossible...”

“Takashi's chances of making it back to Earth after being presumed dead were impossible. Anything is possible, Ryou.” He said. “You of all people should know that by now.”

He did have a point. Things were just...they were getting crazier and crazier, and at some point, it was all going to come to a whole pinnacle of weird. So, now was time to gather what this was all saying. “Alright...” Ryou ran his own hands through his hair, gathering his thoughts. “So, getting this all straightened out...My brother came back from space looking like a lost rebel from a George Lucas film on a ship you've worked out to work for us. He was abducted by four kids in a giant, blue, mechanical lion, and from what I'm gathering, you want me to go out there, find them, and hopefully bring them back without running into whatever the hell took the other Holts.” Ryou's summary was spot on, really.

“Well, if you're condensing it that far, you forgot to add possibly finding the whereabouts of Samuel and Matthew, too. If Takashi came back alive, there's hope that they may be, too.” He replied, giving a half assed smile. “So, what do you think?”

“I think you're insane.” Ryou snapped back, crossing his arms over his chest. “What the hell is going on in your guys' heads that makes you think you should send out another person?”

“You're not just any person, though! You're our best chance we have!” The car had long since come to a stop, sitting in front of the Garrison main building.

“ _Second_ best. Your first best was abducted with four kids and a blue lion.” Ryou retorted, tempted to just take his bag and walk out.

Aaron was growing agitated himself, pursing his lips and stroking his beard. “Could you at least look at the ship and make sure it's running properly? There's a lot of technology I'm sure you'd love to look at...after all, that's what you're known for, right? And, you know, being your brother's shadow.”

It was true, though. He had struck at a soft spot. Takashi was the one who was friends with everyone, and he was like the Brad Pitt of the school, except even better. He was the best pilot they had seen in years, a legend in every household. He was the Neil Armstrong of the century. He had been interviewed by daytime television before the launch of the Kerberos Exploration Mission. Everyone loved him for who he was. A five golden star pilot with a heart just as bright.

Then there was Ryou. The dropout pilot-engineer who spent his days hunched over his desk, building useless knick-knacks so that he wouldn't fail his classes entirely. The one who had to keep himself busy in order to not worry so much about the world around him. He always had to be searching, typing, reading, doing something so that he wouldn't tear himself apart. His parents saw him as the spitting image of that golden standard they held. He walked like him, talked like him, in their eyes. He was the lesser known sibling, and he didn't have a name or money to his name. Compared to his brother, Ryou was an absolute train wreck.

“If you want to keep walking around in that hole he's left behind, you can. I won't stop you from turning back now and going home.” Aaron said quietly, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees. “But you can easily rig that ship properly. I've seen your work. You work like you've got the hands of God. There are things out there nobody has ever seen, creatures we never knew existed. You could be a hero, Ryou. You'd make us all proud.”

He was fueling that fire in his chest that was sparked by jealousy, and extinguished by love. That empathetic feeling for Coleen losing her family, her _whole_ family now, mothers finding out their own children wouldn't come home. It was a devastating feeling. He knew that feeling. Damn his heart for being too strong... He didn't want anyone to hurt anymore. “No.” Ryou breathed, looking Aaron in the eyes. “I'm _going to make you proud.”_

The smile that bloomed across L.C. Aaron's face was priceless. Holding out his hand, Ryou took it and held it tightly in a handshake. “You won't regret any of this. This goes beyond naming prices. We owe you _everything._ ”

 


	6. Chapter 6

 

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With the next few days becoming a whirlwind of activity, Ryou was realzing this was all real. The ship in the blocked off hanger area was astounding. It was a small craft, and just as Aaron had said, it had that fuel sorce that ran continuously.

He had scrapped the damaged parts, brought new parts in and refurbished the whole thing. The inside had been renovated while he worked with others, and a backup power source had also been added. There were two ignition and power systems, so that meant if something went wrong, he'd have another way to get around. Logging all of his findings on the software, he was like a kid at Christmas.

Well, Christmas would be having Takashi come home in one piece, but then again, he really didn't have too many presents to be picking on. Spending most of his time at the Garrison labs, he was finding that he really did miss working on big projects.

In the days before and after his project, he had been given a haircut, something a bit out of the usual norms for Garrison attire. A high and tight, but they left it a bit long up top, keeping the undercut aspect, but left the top a bit shaggy—enough to put in a little hair elastic if he felt like it. Resizing for formal clothes, casual clothes, and the Dickies they handed out for the shop were given to him, and slowly, he remembered how to wash and dry each of those. (Oh, how he hated the formal clothes...They were all wool and uncomfortable.)

It was almost midnight when a call came through on his phone, yanking off one of his work gloves to answer. “Hello, Ryou speaking.”

“ _You could have said something before you left, you know.”_ Makoto's voice was low and quiet, sounding a bit more out of sorts. _“Or, you know, posted the note at our place.”_

“Dad...” Sitting rigid in the chair, he could only stare at the control panel in front of him. “I'm...I'm sorry.”

“ _Don't be. Because you're not.”_ The words stung. It was like rubbing salt in paper cuts, or pressing fingers against open wounds. _“You left us just like he did. You worried us sick, Ryou. We thought you were dead!”_ The sound of his voice was escalating, his eyes growing misty at the sound. _“You left us! You left us!”_

The sound of something blaring woke him up suddenly, his face having been pressed against the keyboard. There was a puddle of drool that was pooled where his face had been, leading him to believe that he fell asleep. Of course he did. These dreams were becoming more and more common as the guilt that was building up in his stomach bubbled its way up through him like bile.

He was still wearing his work gloves, too. Pulling those off, he ran his hands through his hair, looking at the coding he had done the night before. It had gotten sloppy in places, and he could see errors. So, he started plunking away at the keys again.

“Clock's off...right?” He murmured, squinting at the time that was displayed on his phone. Three am. The witching hour. Knowing some people were into that sort of stuff, he knew it was probably bad luck to really be working on anything at this point in time, but then again, Ryou's whole family history was bad luck. What did he have to lose?

At some point during the morning, he shrugged off the top of his work clothes, tying the sleeves around his waist. Tattoos weren't smiled upon, as they seemed 'Disorderly' and overall associated with delinquency, but, then again, Ryou was the favorite around here. He had seen the younger students look at him with a bit of shock and awe, like they were watching some sort of movie actor walk through like it was a scene from _Top Gun_ or _Indiana Jones._

Four am finally rolled around, and one of the first engineers came in. This one was a bit of a different one. She was tall, bit of a middle build, and her whole head was shaved. Ryou noticed in the few days he had been working with her, she had a habit of rubbing the back of her head when she was tired, and she lived off of granola bars. (Kind of his style, really.) She went by Mo, because Morrigan was too formal, and 'Kepper' was what they called her in volleyball when she was in high school. ('This isn't high school'.) “You've been here all night, haven't you?” Two cups of coffee in hand, she sighed and set one cup down beside Ryou, still half asleep. Just the regular Garrison Dickies, along with a New Jersey tourist trap shirt under it.

“Fell asleep here, woke up here.” Ryou shrugged, taking the cup without hesitation and took a sip. “God, that really touches the soul...” 

“What soul?” Mo snorted and wandered back to the shelves for inventory, looking everything over. “You know, they're thinking they'll have this baby out and flying in a few days. Especially since you're working on it.”

“Oh yeah?” The fact that they were thinking about launching him out into space made his empty stomach twist and turn, pretending to look over his own work. He could feel her eyes on the back of his head, and it wasn't a good feeling.

“...You should probably call your parents and tell them you're not dead in the desert. If your parents are anything like mine, you should.” Morrigan had a point. Even so, she rubbed the back of her head and sighed, looking at the now pale blue illuminated ship. “...Plus, we need to think of a name for this little thing. Every good ship has a name, right? Plus, we gotta christen it, too.”

“What, and waste a bottle of champagne?”

For four am, the conversation was actually pretty light. Considering that the two were already pretty open as it was, their conversations got a bit dark sometimes. “Psh, nah. Just throw a cold beer at it and call it good.”

Even so, eventually it got quiet as more workers came in, putting on finishing touches to the interior, and started stocking it with supplies. A first aid kit, emergency materials, tanks of oxygen, guns and knives... The usual things one would need on a space exploration.

But, the idea of calling his parents really stuck with him throughout the day. So when noon hit, Ryou realized that it was probably about time to actually try and sleep, they let him off the hook since he pulled long hours already.

Even if he was supposed to be heading back for sleep, the trip to his room and to the showers ended up being a long walk with his phone in his hand, and his work clothes still on him. He almost felt like a ghost wandering the now empty halls of the East Wing of the campus. He walked these halls before. He remembered the smell of motor oil and the look on his face when he saw solid jet fuel for the first time and how he _so_ wanted to set it on fire.

He remembered the first self sustaining engine he made with the latest technology, and how fast it went as the torque from the machine sent him flying down the drag strip they were practicing on. There were so many memories already, and he was watching them right before his eyes. Muscle memory brought him back to the rooftop of the Garrison, overlooking the expanse of the red clay desert. At nighttime, it was gorgeous. Stars littered the skies, and the haze from nearby cities were nowhere to be seen. With the air chilling at night, it was something Ryou loved dearly. But now, it was hot, and the sun was beating down on the solar panels. No clouds in the skies, no sight of anyone around.

Looking at the phone screen, he sighed heavily. “I should probably call...” After all, he had service on his phone now, and they'd probably enjoy the call... He only got as far as unlocking it before he locked the screen again, wandering back inside. The deep remorse and guilt was bubbling up again, and he couldn't bring himself to do anything about it.

Would they be upset? Did Makoto tell Jun about what Ryou was doing? Was he even going to tell them what he was doing? What if they got ill while he was gone? What if they missed him? What about the aliens? Groaning loudly, he was about to go back inside the building before he stomped back out to the railing, one hand tangled in his hair, the other gripping his phone still. “What the hell are you doing?!” He screamed, hitting the metal bar with his fists.

Nothing answered, and only the echo of his own voice remained in the empty air. Panting lightly, he knew he was working himself up. He was functioning on only a few hours of sleep, and it was getting to him. _Calm down, calm down, deep breaths..._ Taking in a deep breath through his nose, he breathed out through his mouth, trying to figure out what he was doing with his life in general. Another deep breath, and he tilted his head towards the sun, closing his eyes.

Without much warning, the quiet sound of that Skype ringtone popped up again, the cellular device vibrating in his hand. _'Call from: The Parental Units'_ He forgot to change that, hunh? It cycled through the ringtone a couple more times before he hesitantly put his finger to the green phone button, dragging it over to answer. This...was real, wasn't it?

“Hello?”

“ _Ryou! You answered, thank heavens--”_ Jun's voice was tired, he could tell, and the worry in her voice gave her away. _“We thought we'd stop by today and we found your note—you didn't tell us you were leaving? Why?”_

“Mama, I...I'm sorry. It's just...there's a lot going on right now, and I didn't have time to think about it. They wanted me there for that job and everything, and-”

“ _Ryou.”_ Biting his tongue, he could feel his heart jump into his chest again from his stomach, closing his eyes as she spoke to him. _“You don't need to explain. I...I had a feeling that there was something you couldn't tell us. Your father told me about what happened, and what might have been going on.”_

There was a bit of silence on the other end of the phone, followed by a heavy sigh from Jun. “I'm sorry I didn't say anything. It just...I didn't want to upset you.”

“ _I understand that.”_ Still, he could hear the pain in her voice as she gathered herself. _“And...as parents, as you do your own things and make your own decisions, we have to learn to let go. As much as I'd love to, I can't follow in your footsteps when mine have already been laid out behind me.”_ Heaving a heavy, yet shaky breath, Jun sounded like she was tearing up. _“No matter what you do or where you go, you are your own person, and we love you more than you'll ever know.”_

Ryou's hand found its way to his mouth, his own eyes becoming misty. It might have been the fact that the heat was starting to get to him, or the fact that he was lacking on sleep that made him so emotional, but as the moments passed, the tears flowed steadily. “I know you do...” He said quietly, his own voice quivering. “I promise I'll come home, mama.”

“ _I know you will. You always do, you know.”_ She tried to make a bit of a joke, the laugh falling from her chest came out a bit flat.

With the call not lasting long after that, Ryou finally went back inside, the cool air washing over him like the ocean. Shuddering, he wrapped his arms around himself for a couple moments, trying to regulate his body temperature. Was Makoto still angry? What would being angry serve in terms of purpose? Maybe there was that wash of forgiveness that would clear things up when he got back.

Milling back through the halls to the dorms, Ryou sighed and went to his old dorm... Well...It was actually Takashi's. It had been unused since he had been 'discharged' into space, turned back into the empty dorm it had been previously when they had packed up all his things and took them home. Now, the name on it read _'R.Shirogane'_. There were only a few things that littered the walls—a few photographs, a couple of things on the shelf and the 'tinker toys' he had picked up on the first day back. The bathroom itself had travel sized toiletries for now, leaving him to ration out his shampoo and conditioner for the time being.

The room itself had a great view of the desert, the mountains in the distance shimmering in the high heat outside. At night, the rocks looked like a burnt orange and the sky turned purple in the sunset. It was beautiful...

Throwing off his work clothes, he pulled on the leftover pajamas he had been switching in and out of between sleeping and working. Glancing at the few photos on the wall, he sighed heavily, picking up one of the ones that had fallen off. It was their first day at the Garrison. They had taken two photos so that they could each have one. Takashi's copy was somewhere, but he had no idea where. Probably somewhere in the memories packed away at home.

They both weren't used to the dry heat, so they looked a bit uncomfortable, as those used to different weather would be in the desert. But, there was the facility in the background, along with a pair of 'bunny ears' behind Takashi's head. _'First steps to becoming great!'_ Yeah... 'great'.

“I'm gonna find you, Takashi. I'm gonna bring you all home.” He said quietly, heaving a sigh before Ryou crawled into bed and pulled the blankets up over his head to block out the sunlight.

Dreams didn't come, leaving him to soundly sleep through the hours, drifting through the dark.

 

... . . -..-. -.-- --- ..- -..-. ... --- --- -.

 

“You realize that even though you're the favorite now, you've got to adopt at least a somewhat healthy routine around here...right?” Aaron had been tasked to try and get Ryou onto a decent sleep schedule, and already it was hell. It was six in the morning, and Ryou was a zombie, staring at the other over a cup of coffee in the main cafeteria. “That ship'll be ready to fly in days, and I've got to get you into a routine.” How Aaron had been turned into a babysitter, he never knew, but it was going to be interesting.

“...I'm aware.” Ryou finally said, sipping the black brew with a bit of a frown, staring into the cup. _Weak._ “How do you drink this...? It tastes like water.”

Aaron sighed heavily and rubbed his temples, staring at the other with irritability in his eyes. “Most of us actually get here on time when they haven't dulled the coffee down for the students. Most of them know the coffee schedule around here.”

“I'm not waking up at five for good coffee.”

“Then you're not getting good coffee, now are you?” Both of them were just as tired as the other, in different ways. “You've also got to go back through your piloting classes. It'll be a crash course, but we don't want you wrecking that thing.”

“What do you mean I have to retake the classes?” Ryou nearly spat. “Look, I know I'm second best, but I don't need to retake the classes with a bunch of...of...”

“Go ahead, say it. They haven't not heard it before.” Aaron sighed, rolling his eyes.

“ _Fucking children._ ” Ryou uttered, keeping his voice low for the time being. “You've got to be kidding me. Just..."

“Hey, if you test out alright, you don't have to take the rest of the crash course, easy as that. You've just got to get at least an eighty or above on the flight simulator, and then you'll do your course with the cruiser we've got sitting in the garage.” The blond man nearly purred, smiling at Ryou's easily distressed expression. “What, can you handle that?”

“Oh, I'll handle it. When's the earliest I can take it?”

“The single man simulator is free this afternoon if you wanna take a whack at it with the class attending.” Aaron shrugged, smiling lightly. He knew that Ryou wasn't too keen about taking tests and doing classes with children, his vanity getting the better of him all at once. “You really need to get over the fact that you're going to have to review your skills.” He snorted, giving the other one of those awkward smiles. Ryou frowned widely at this, shaking his head slowly.

“I can wait until it'll just be me, you know.”

“It's filled to the max capacity for two months, or later. I can't do anything or move anyone takin' the test. It's not too often that there's kids who are ready and able to take the singles tests. Most of them go into teams.” He explained, folding his hands in front of him. “You're going to test out, or you're gonna keep trying until you get it, either way.”

With that in mind, he had also been given a schedule of when the simulator was open, and when the classes he was going to sit in on. They were all early in the morning, eight am, and they were all with second year students who were planning on applying on making an attempt at piloting on their own. It was usually for cargo piloting just in case they were going on their own. Now a days, going alone wasn't really the safest option, but there were still students that wanted to go about it on their own...kinda like semi drivers. Space was their road, and the time alone was something that was appealing.

Even so, it was really mortifying to take the tests with a bunch of little kids. Well... 'Little Kids' to his standard. Most of them were almost hitting eighteen, but then again, according to the calendars, Ryou himself was sitting at about...six. (Damn Leap Year Birthdays...) If only they had waited about ten more minutes. Then they'd be born on March first... Either way, there was nothing he could do about it now. It wasn't his mother's fault that everything dropped that evening.

Even so, everything was just as he remembered, class wise. An hour long, and he couldn't focus through any of it. It was impossible, especially when the instructor was so new and boring...

It went like this for a few days. Morning classes, boring lecture, testing, pass. Morning classes, boring lecture, simulator intro class, pass, move on. It all was going fine and dandy until the third or fourth day in when he tested out on the actual simulator and failed. Seventy.

Out of one hundred, he had scored out at seventy. Staring at the screen after, his eyes were wide, and he grabbed the thrusters and moved them back and forth. “Dammit!”

“Could you please exit the simulator? We've got more testing to do and if we run out of time, you're going to put everyone off.” The instructor sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. Little did she know, she'd be seeing more of Ryou.

As the days went on, Ryou tried harder and harder to pass the simulation. He crashed. He always crashed. Something went wrong, and he was unable to fix it without landing properly. He had tried doing the simulation at least two times per class, making sure to try and pass each time, but he couldn't. Growling loudly as he left the simulator, he nearly ran into Aaron on his way out.

“Well, you look happier than a clam.” The blond man nearly got a death threatening stare, making Ryou realize how pinched his face was with anger. “Don't worry about it, you're doing your best.” They were about two days out from the deadline, and the physicals had been done, the routines, everything...except actually being able to leave the base and make progress to finding the lost cadets and Takashi.

“I just... I can't get it right.” Ryou hissed, leaning away as Aaron tried wrapping an arm around his shoulder, making him back off.

“You just need some time to relax. Pushing yourself too hard isn't going to make you any better. You'll crack like an pressurized thermal pipe.” He cooed, nudging his arm instead. He knew that Ryou was disappointed in himself, even more so now that he couldn't do something that some _children_ had passed. Some of them barely passed, but it was still passing. “Tell you what. It's a Friday night. A few of my colleagues were thinking about getting a drink. I'll personally fuel your tab.”

“Are you sure about that?” Ryou asked, lifting his head to look Aaron right in the eye. Maybe he didn't know what kind of mess Aaron just got himself into. But, he'd soon find out.

The ride into town was quite short, compared to the ride he took from the airport to the Garrison. Things weren't so difficult, nor were they too drawn out. He still chatted with the pair of faculty members that had come along, and Aaron, whom was actually quite hospitable.

Then came the booze.

It had started out with a cheap beer, and even Ryou had thought that was where it was going to stop for him. But oh no, it was not. It got worse as someone from across the room bought him a drink. Strawberry daiquiri. Not really his thing, but it was something nice, right? A few more beers, and things were getting tipsy.

From there on, things got blurrier and blurrier. He vaguely remembered party beads, taking off his shirt at one point and tossing it over to someone, putting on a different shirt, finding his old shirt, more beads, then it sped back up to real time when he ended up puking in the bathroom. There was a faint notion that he should probably stop, and there was one missed call from Aaron again, with a text saying that they were leaving in fifteen minutes. “Better get another round in...” Ryou murmured at one point. Another round of drinks (He didn't know what kind) and everything sort of faded to black at that moment.

The next morning, Ryou woke up in a haze. The sky was bright and the clock read three in the afternoon. There were missed calls on his phone, and a headache in his head. The smell of last night's vomit clung to him like stink on a skunk. Sitting upright slowly (and painfully), there were a few messages that caught his attention.

_From: Mo_

_Congrats on passing the flight simulator. Aaron came in today and said that we were putting the final details on the ship today. It'll be ready to launch on Monday at this rate. -MO_  
  
From: Mo

_Plus, Aaron thinks you're a terrifying heavyweight._

 

_From: Aaron Barnes_

_I thought I'd let you know that you ran up quite the tab last night._

_Regardless, you passed last night on the flight simulator. You said you wanted to try it at three in the morning while absolutely shitfaced._

_Y_ _ou're downright terrifying. You basically did what your brother did sober._

 

Honestly, Ryou couldn't believe it. Well, he couldn't until Mo sent him the footage from the simulator on Snapchat. A very drunk Ryou sat in the front seat, teetering along with the steering wheel, humming 'Space Oddity' up until the simulation turned for the worse, rocking and teetering, Ryou stood up and belted out the chorus, moving the wheel accordingly. The singing, however, wasn't the best.

“Oh my fucking God.” Ryou murmured, staring at the screen in disbelief. Takashi would shit a brick if he saw this. If. If was just the right word for the situation at hand. Listening to the voicemail left behind, it was just one of his other coworkers asking him to come down immediately when he woke up, and how the night before was 'fucking amazing'. Even if Ryou didn't remember half of it, he'd have to take Chuck's word for it.

Things were falling into place once again, and that rush made Ryou lay back in bed, looking at the ceiling. Ryou knew that Aaron had been rubbing salt in wounds in order to get Ryou to move and do as he wanted, but at the same time Ryou wanted answers. Takashi was alive. That was true. Four students went missing over the span of two days. That was also true. A blue mechanical lion bigger than any craft spotted in Roswell showed up and disappeared all in one day.

He was convinced that things in life, at least some of them, were unexplained miracles. Ryou, Takashi, and Jun making it out of the hospital alive: A miracle. Both Shirogane boys making it into the Garrison with the last scraps of change in their pockets: Miracle. Watching a beautiful sunset and an off shore storm at the same time? An astounding miracle.

On top of that, there were even more strange things that didn't fall under the miracle category. Ghosts, Mothman, the Jersey Devil, _aliens_ , brothers that mysteriously come back from space with strange metal prosthetic arms.

Frankly, Ryou couldn't tell where this was for him. Was it a miracle, or an anomaly?

Rubbing his hands on his face, he looked at the clock again, sighing heavily. He should at least try and get up and drink some water. Groaning as he got himself out of bed and to the bathroom, there were clothes scattered on the floor. He probably should do laundry before they sealed up his room for good. There was a note written in erasable marker (the whiteboard marker was laying in the sink), scrawled in Ryou's handwriting. _'You fuckin' passed you passed'_ Good to know that Drunk Ryou was looking out for Ryou. Not bothering to mess with the plastic cup next to the sink, he turned on the water and leaned his head down for a long drink. Honestly, he didn't miss the taste of desert well water. But, being hung over, he didn't want to bother with going down and getting bottled water. Ryou didn't think that far ahead, otherwise he'd have two one liter bottles sitting on the dresser.

Looking back up at himself with water dripping down his chin, he almost expected to see someone else in the mirror. It was one of those strange, quiet moments that almost felt too familiar, like he was somewhere else in time.

Like he was back at his second year, still sharing a room with his brother while getting ready for class. Or the day they both had gone to a party and came back drunk and took turns drinking out of the sink after Takashi threw up for the first time while drinking. Hell, he almost had the inkling that he was going to get yelled at by his father for drinking right out of the tap. (That was one of his few complaints he voiced.)

Pulling a couple tugs of toilet paper, he wiped down the mirror and picked up the marker from the sink. The nib was nearly pushed into the ink well, and it smelled of chemical, like most whiteboard markers did. But, for the sake of things, he started writing.

 

.. ..-. / -.-- --- ..- / .- .-. . / .-. . .- -.. .. -. –. / - …. .. …

\- .- -.- .- … …. .. / … …. .. .-. --- –. .- -. . / .. … / .- .-.. .. ...- .

Delta Oscar November Oscar Tango Romeo Echo Papa Echo Alpha Tango.

Charlie Hotel Echo Charlie Kilo Lima India Bravo Romeo Alpha Romeo Alpha Romeo Yankee

Bravo Oscar Oscar Kilo ' _S.Hart 304.44 p.69'_

 

.-. -.-- --- ..- / … …. .. .-. --- –. .- -. .

 

Might as well leave something behind, right? Hopefully Ryou's little scavenger hunt that he left behind a couple years ago was still ongoing. In the book, there was a little decoding sheet for the old code they used, along with the phonetic alphabet that the military used.

Maybe some day one of the students would find the list of pranks with no culprits.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks again to Wyatt (sarcasstic-meme.tumblr.com) for letting me bounce ideas. After all, Wyatt's the one that has to suffer with me as a sibling.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reading back through this, I'm realizing that I've got a few inconsistencies while writing. They're not too hard to notice, but at the same time, I'm looking back to see what Jun looks like and I guess I should have done a better job describing her. (It's a bit late anyways, so whoops.) 
> 
> For the record, Jun is short, starting out at five foot three and shrinking to five foot two as she ages. She has a heart shaped face, dark brown hair, and a heart shaped face with high cheekbones. Her build is fit, but as she ages, she stays slim. She also has grey eyes. (After all, Ryou and Takashi have to at least have some good looks from their mom, right? She's cute after all.)
> 
> Makoto is a normally built man with a tendency to gain around the middle, but all around healthy looking. He stands at around five foot nine. He has dark brown, almost black hair, usually sports a heavy tan from being outside, and in the early years, he sported sparse facial hair (Usually a soul patch, or a goatee. Jun later suggests he keeps it to a soul patch and a mustache as they grow older.)

“Alright, so you've tested out of the flight simulator with flying colors. While not sober.” Ryou was talking to himself, pacing back and forth in his room. With the still unnamed ship being finished up and the pit crew still trying to figure out a name for it, Ryou was left with free time, and space suit fittings. It had to be something that he could put on himself, so that warranted them to use prototypes that they had been working on. Which, to Ryou, was a bit nerve wracking. But, apparently they were air tight. Sitting in the bottom of the test pool in the Garrison, there was no leaks to be reported in all their prototypes.

So far so good, right?

Stopping in the middle of his room, Ryou sighed and ran his hands through his hair again, staring at the wall with the photos on it. He'd have to take those down and pack everything up just in case. After all, if he didn't come back, it'd make things easier for them to haul out. So, he had snagged a couple boxes out of the kitchen when the shipment of groceries came in, dragging them back to his room with packing tape that he had snagged off of someone's desk. Everything except for the bedding and the photos on the wall were packed away, along with the exception of his clothes still hanging around the room. He'd been meaning to wash them in the community laundry room, but he never really got time.

It was Tuesday anyways. Laundry day. Plus, doing something so menial would probably be good for the body, right?

Picking up everything he could fit in the basket (tossing aside all the clean smelling clothes,) it left him with at least three pairs of work clothes in the basket, dirty underwear, towels, and an unhealthy amount of socks. Why he had so many, it was beyond him.

Still, with so much on his mind, it was starting to get to him how real this was. He was going to get shot out into space to find his brother, five living, breathing children, and hopefully no aliens. He was going to come back into the atmosphere, alive, with his brother, five living, breathing children, and eventually become a miracle worker and a figure head for some sort of alien abduction prevention firm. Either that, or a man in black. (He could probably deal with that, if it were anything like the movie.)

Wandering down to the community laundry in his pajamas yet (tank top and boxers, how classy), as he loaded everything into one of the near industrial sized washer, more thoughts came to him. _I wonder what it's like out there. Can't say I've ever been to space. I wonder what it would be like if we actually went to college to be doctors like mama wanted. I wonder if I'd be a good doctor._ That warrented a wide frown, and a shake of his head as he dumped in the detergent. _Nah, I don't like kids and I hate blood._ _Takashi likes kids, though. He'd probably be one of those child doctors._ Slamming the door to the washer shut, he punched in the wash cycle, and sat on the folding table, pulling out his phone from his waistband. More thoughts came along, his mind stringing them together like a pearl necklace. _If anything, I guess I could have gone to regular flight school. I could have been a plane mechanic or a pilot._ History book lessons came back to his mind, in a flash of explosions, mass terror and ill placed racism. _Maybe not a Jumbo Jet pilot._

Scrolling through his news feed, there were a few notifications from his other family members in Japan, mostly his aunt and cousins whom he rarely talked to. Messages popped up from them in the DM's. _'I heard about you going back to school! Good luck teaching!' 'I'm proud of you for returning! You can do it!!'_ Aunt Mami and cousin Akiko knew at least some of the story then, hunh?

The younger cousins who had more access to the internet and the deep Reddit conversations were linking him to conspiracy theories about the Kerberos Accident, and content that had been taken down by an unknown source. It was like _they_ almost knew what was going on.

While the washing machine sloshed on, Ryou looked through all the unplayed snap messages on his phone, checked all his social media, and started working on the pictures in his photo gallery. The first photo had actually been one that Takashi sent. The captions on the sides told him the timestamp and when it had been taken. The day of the launch. It was him, Matt, and Sam in the background looking kind of confused. That was the last message he had sent him on his phone. They looked so young...Had it really been more than a year ago? How much had Ryou changed since then? Did he still look like his brother?

The next few photos were pictures of dogs that he had seen, with captions from snapchat as 'Dog', 'Dog!!', 'douge', 'degg' and another picture of one of his old friends on the East coast playing with his dog's face and the caption that read ' e x p a n d d o g e'. That always made him laugh, that was for sure.

More photos revealed old recipes he had found, took pictures of, and put the book back at the book store. He knew he could look them up, but what was the point in that when you had a photo of the page and instructions?

More pictures of people he didn't talk to anymore, a drunk video of one of his friends doing drag makeup and Ryou hitting on them (He only did that when drunk. Otherwise, any sort of potential action was pointless when sober.), and a handful of Instagram selfies that never made the cut, but the filters had already been applied.

He had been happy when he was living on the East Coast. He was one person in a big city where nobody knew his name or cared to know. A small friend group that came in and went out of his life like the tide, along with a few tide pool friends that stuck around for the ride.

He had to move in a span of three days, breaking a lease that took most of his money, dragging out money for a plane ticket and being reimbursed for at least most of it. It took a lot of money to drag his stuff home—he originally went to the coast with nothing but what was in his suitcase and the floor futon someone gave him for Christmas. Everything had either been sold by his old friends, or gifted as an 'early Christmas/birthday/'thank you for being here for me'/whatever gift.

But why hadn't he moved back? Since he moved back, he had been stuck. Why hadn't he just kept everything and stayed like anyone else? He could move on with his life after the memorial service. What had gotten him stuck at home in the first place?

His parents had said that they appreciated him coming back but 'You really don't need to stay if you don't want to.' Had he moved for them, or did he move for himself? Was if for him? Or his parents?

Things were starting to spin faster in his head, like the machine whirring on spin cycle, flattening out his thoughts and rapidly squashing them against the sides of his skull as the axis for his thoughts spun on.

Was a lot of what he did based on the stereotypes and what was thought of him? He was the second born. Little brother. He had to be more loud and obnoxious, right? To make up for the first child's quiet and soft demeanor.

He was the younger brother, he always had to keep busy and compensate for what the older brother did and excelled at. Takashi got an A, Ryou tried for an A, got an A-. Big brother gets the gold star, little got the silver. Best, second best. Quiet, reserved, versus loud and rebellious. Clean and tidy, messy and disorganized. White and black, up and down, left and right, positive and negative, heads and tails.

_When did I become the lesser? When did I become the second best?_

These thoughts and more spun faster and faster in his head until the buzzing of the washing machine jolted him into the real world, holding his phone with white knuckles and a worried face from the other side of the room.

“Hey, dude...Are you okay? You're pullin' some really weird faces over there.” A couple of older students had found their way in, looking just about the same way he did. Still in pajamas.

After a moment, Ryou shook his head and sighed, finally nodding. “Yeah, I'll be fine. Just...Lots to think about this week.”

“Ugh, same though. I've got three finals to study for. Plus I'm running the group sim with you.” One of the kids said to the other, waving his hand around for emphasis. “You can barely think straight and drive!”

“Excuse me, but have you seen the way you fix things? You're all over the place!” The other said, folding their clothes as the first put his in the dryer.

Ryou couldn't help but to pick up on this, tilting his head. “What's got you all over the place?” He finally asked, hopping up off the table, finally set on attending to his own clothes. “Somethin' with nerves, or what?”

There was a bit of an odd silence, one of the kids saying 'Spill, Derek.' before the male student spoke. “I can't focus when I'm on the spot. Everything just keeps flying everywhere and I end up freakin' out when I've gotta fix things.”

That seemed easy enough to fix. “Pace your breathing. Talk yourself through what's going on and what you see. It's kinda like when you're punching in code and talking to the rubber duck when you do it. That makes sense, right?” Ryou asked, pulling out a dryer sheet from the community storage, looking to the pilot of the two. “And for piloting, I can't help you there.”

The two looked at each other, then back to Ryou, almost as if they were asking 'why'. “...I may have gotten into the solo simulator at three in the morning and passed that way. I don't know how, but I did, all the while belting out retro music at the top of my lungs.”

“Dude...That's untapped potential. Maybe...”

“ _Don't._ I know what you're thinking, and do not. I'm not condoning drug usage on Garrison property. You both could get yourselves expelled. Just...” Ryou hissed, pointing at the two of them. “Be. Good. And don't freak out. Talk yourselves through it, and communicate.” He coached, narrowing his eyes at the two before making a vague 'I see you' gesture.

It was just enough to get the pair of students to slowly turn back to their laundry, finishing up and going back to talking among themselves. Still, Ryou waited for his clothes to wash, then dry, deciding that maybe it'd be better if they just air dried. So, halfway through the drying cycle, he just so happened to pull his clothes out (like a lunatic in the eyes of the other students) and wandered back to his room. Too much time outside of the four walls he called 'home'.

He had an idea of what he was going to do anyways. Grabbing the tension rod out of the bathroom, he stripped off the shower curtain and stretched it out as far as it would go. It'd be wide enough for his room—from the study nook wall to the wall where his bed was lined up against, it was a tight squeeze. Perfect. So, thus started the unceremonious stringing of shirts and hanging pants over the tension rod.

About halfway through, he paused for a moment and just thought to himself, 'why did I do that?'. It wouldn't have been that much longer and he could have just waited for the clothes to dry in the dryer. He could have even left them there and set a timer on his phone. He finally got to the conclusion that it was due to boredom. He had been sitting too long and it bothered him, so he did what he thought best to combat that. Change the routine, use the tension rod. The small joys of being oddly smart were starting to become more like burdens than anything.

Ryou wondered what it'd be like for him when he was ejected from Earth into space. They'd better send him stuff to tinker with, otherwise he'd end up bored as hell and probably dead from such boredom.

Either way, it wasn't helping that they were doing testing on the ship to see if it was fully functioning and able to go through its space voyage. So far so good on that.

The reality that he was going to go out into space was still not quite there. He couldn't quite believe everything that happened thus so far. Like...Everything was a dream still. Like reality was just out of reach. Or, you know, maybe he was just disassociating so much after all that was going on.

Ryou found himself staring at the wall for a while before he decided to just pick out some clothes he missed on the floor, ran his hands through his hair and went out in search of something to do. Now that he was in that grey area of time before the final touches were being finished, there wasn't much he needed to do. Everyone else was doing their jobs, making the time alone unbearable.

There were classes going on, and looking through the windows as he walked, it was becoming clearer and clearer to him that he was basically living out the 'problematic hero' sort of stereotype. It wasn't the first time he had actually thought of it, of course, but it more so made him grimace when he thought about it, ending up looking like he was glaring at a bunch of young adults while slowly strolling by their classrooms.

All the reminiscing he was doing was more so putting a kink in his mood, and just walking around wasn't the best way to deal with all of this. So, backtracking through the building, he started wandering towards the hangar where the little cruiser was.

Morrigan was in there already, while the others were gone on lunch break. “So, what's up with you? Haven't seen you since...” She frowned, looking up from her work. “...The last time I saw you, I guess.

Ryou pulled up a rolling chair, plopping himself down. “I'm just...I'm having one of those days where it feels like I'm having this big ol' character arc and I don't like feeling like the hero in this.” Ryou frowned, getting a look from his cohort.

“...Sounds like you're trying to break the fourth wall here.” She replied, turning away from her work, crossing her arms in front of her. “Are you doing this for good? This whole thing. Exploring space and finding your brother. Is this for good?”

“Well, yeah. Kids got dragged into it, and it's just...It's fucked up.” Ryou answered. “Where are you going with this?”

“I wasn't sure where I was going with this, but what I'm going to get at here is that what you're doing is probably good, and to some you're being a hero, but you're also doing this for yourself.” Morrigan explained. “Because let's be honest here, if they had sent anyone else other than you, you'd probably be miserable back in your hometown, and probably a deadbeat by thirty.”

He knew she had a point. This was probably the better route in his life rather than any other in different universes alike. “Yeah, but still...I...I don't like the idea of having to fill someone else's shoes. I've been doing that my whole life, literally stepping in the boot holes Takashi left behind.” Ryou's expression made Morrigan drag her hand down her face, a heavy stare coming from the other.

“Who's comparing you to Takashi right now? I know Barnes does just for the sake of motivation, and how you scored on the simulator the other night, but _who_ is saying that _you_ need to fill the shoes he left behind?” She asked him, scooting a bit closer. “Who's the one that's bitter about how far he got while you stayed behind and gave up?”

Ryou shrank back in his chair when she came closer, knowing full and well what she was getting at. “Me.” He said simply, quiet and meager.

“Nobody's been saying you're his little shadow. You're the one who decided to stop when you didn't get in on fighter class. You could have stayed for engineering, you numbskull!” Morrigan poked his forehead with the last insult, pursing her lips into a fine line. “Your failures aren't because Takashi did better than you. You need to stop wallowing in your self pity, because A) it's not getting you anywhere, and B), it's really depressing. _You_ are your own person. _You_ are not the failing byproduct of his success. _You_ are your own being.” She said, staring him in the eyes until it hit right to his core.

“Stop living in the past. You're being hindered by the memories you're thinking of, and dragging yourself back into missing him and wishing nothing changed. You can't go back. No matter how hard you try, there's no going back to the past.” The air had grown lighter, and Ryou could almost feel the spark she ignited in his chest roar to life. “Who are you? And what's your purpose in life?”

“How the hell am I supposed to answer that?”

“I can't tell you who you are and what your driving force is. That's for you to find out. Give you something to think about.” She smiled, knowing that she had started something. “You can't be living the 'Second Best Brother' lie all your life. You're not Takashi, and you never will be. It's terrible to say, but mentally and spiritually, you can't be like just like him.”

That was what got him thinking. Ryou Shirogane. Who was he? Ryou Shirogane. He was an engineer. A good pilot. A quick witted mind that could fix things on the fly. He was a brother. He was his own being. He wasn't the shadow of Takashi. He wasn't here now, so he couldn't wallow in that gaping darkness left behind. There was no shadow to be cast from him now.

He was so many things that were coming to light now that the fire in the furnace of his heart had come to light. Morrigan was right. He had put himself in his brother's shadow. Nobody had forced him to be there. He could have easily made a name for himself. Instead, he wandered aimlessly over a year, trying to find meaning in things that had already happened.

“Have they found a name for the ship yet?” Ryou asked, spinning around to look at the mass of space metal in front of him.

“Nah, Barnes was thinking about 'The Guardian', but that just sounds to pretentious.” Mo snorted, having already gone back to her work. “What, you got a name for it?”

“Wander. We're putting a name to what I'm literally doing out there, so...It's like every other craft we've thrown out into space. The Rover literally roved around Mars, The Discovery discovered things...If I'm going to take this metal hunk out there, I'm going to be wandering.” He explained, getting a small nod from Mo.

“I like it. It's better than the 'Nemo' idea I had.” Turning back to where Ryou was looking, Mo tilted her head and looked at the craft. “The Wander. It's got a nice ring to it.”

 

\--- -. .-- .- .-. -..

 

“ _...It's really hard to know that people take the sunset for granted.” It wasn't too often that Makoto and Jun got to actually sit outside where their little spot was. A small offset ridge on the edge of the island, overlooking the sea, along with the beach below them. But, there they were. Jun with her poor swollen ankles and rounded belly, and Makoto with his bit of facial hair he usually kept to make him look 'distinguished'. Little did he know, he'd be keeping everything that grew in later in life. “Little miracles happen every day and everyone overlooks them.”_

“ _Like the miracle that I didn't chase you off with my shoe when you kept following me down the boardwalk?” Jun couldn't hardly keep her face straight as she pulled her long hair back, tying the loose ends into a low bun. “Or are we both talking about something different entirely?” She had a sharp wit to her, and Makoto in contrast was so soft and sincere to the point where it was painful. Together, they mellowed each other out._

_Jun rubbed wide circles into her distended stomach, the awfully tacky looking fabric seemed to stretch over to the point where it faded the floral print. Makoto could see the slight discomfort on her face as he watched her. “You're thinking about them, aren't you?”_

“ _They said one of us might not come home. It could be me, one of them, or all three.” Jun said quietly, looking to Makoto. “It's a miracle we've gotten this far to begin with. We're literally living paycheck to paycheck. It's hard to believe that we're actually financially stable enough to even_ think _about children let alone trying to bring them into this world.”_

“ _Jun...you are very, very right.” Makoto tried to soothe the other by putting an arm around her shoulders, but it didn't seem to do much. Sighing heavily, he rested his head on her shoulder. “I didn't think I'd even get a second date with you, or that I'd ever see you again when you went back home.” He said quietly, watching for a change in her still stern face. “I didn't even think you'd turn around when I started playing music and waddling after you like a moron. But you did.”_

“ _I did because I wanted to tell you to shut up, but you looked cute. Smiling like an absolute fool.” She said quietly in response, a smile twitching at the corner of her mouth. “I didn't think you wanted to marry someone who's so stubborn. Not too many men want to marry someone who has to keep herself busy all the time.”_

“ _You know I can't run finances. If it weren't for you, I'd probably still be living with my parents.” He hummed, wondering how that would even work. “What I was trying to get at, is we've gotten this far. The future is right in front of us, and we'll just have to wait and see what happens.” Makoto said quietly, heaving a sigh and looking up to Jun again, those soft brown eyes finding hers. “If that means losing you and coming home with a fraction of my family, I can only be grateful for the time I had with you.”_

“ _You're a terrible sap and you're even worse at motivational speaking.” Jun couldn't help but to smile dryly, pressing a kiss to her husband's forehead. “I'm grateful for all the time I've spent with you. Without you, my life would be absolutely incompl...” Stopping shortly, she rubbed her hand over her stomach again, frowning widely. “Incomplete.”_

“ _Was that a foot?” Sure enough, another foot seemed to roll across below the stomach, and another on the other side._

“ _It felt more like fingernails.” She grumbled, moving to lay back a bit more, but instead, her eyes grew wide, and the sunset viewing didn't seem to be that great anymore. “My water just broke.”_

“ _You what?”_

“ _My water. Just broke.” Jun shuffled to get upright again, trying to roll over to get to her feet, along with Makoto scrambling to get her to the car._

“ _I thought you said you were due in April!” Makoto finally got her up, fumbling for the car keys as he started panicking more than she did. “They said March into April!”_

“ _They said March, but they said if they were late, almost April into May, they'd do something about it!” Jun retorted, pushing Makoto out of the way and to the passenger side of the car, easing herself in. “Drive! Don't panic!”_

“ _Jun, I'm panicking. I'm panicking.” Makoto hissed, starting the car haphazardly, throwing the vehicle into drive before peeling out from the lookout. “Oooh I can feel the contractions.”_

“ _I'm not even having contractions yet, and you're feeling them before me? That doesn't even make sense!” Jun hissed, scooting down so that she could sit comfortably. “I didn't think they'd be ready by now! I'm at least a month early!”_

_Makoto focused on traffic more so, trying to remember what they had said about having twins. “They usually don't come to full term, right? There's always a bit of an early-” He yelped, passing a different driver on the freeway. “They're early because they're early, there's no reason why they're not not early!”_

“ _Alright, alright, that makes sense.” Jun leaned the passenger seat back, trying to keep calm. “When we get there, if I'm not having any contractions, they're probably going to have to induce me, or I'll have to wander around and try to get contractions to start.” She was more so talking to herself to keep her mind moving, not to get worried. Looking over at Makoto, he had gone pale. Reaching over, she squeezed his arm and gave him a heavy look, just like the many times before when she talked him out of a bad decision. “You're not going to freak out when we get to the hospital. Everything is fine, I know what's happening with my body, and if I'm not worried, you're not worried.” She said._

_While things didn't go smoothly for everyone, it ended up being that there were more pros than cons of the whole thing. Labor started a while after Jun's water broke. One of the unnamed twins had decided to rotate and try coming out sideways, but slipped into position soon after the first was born._

_So, at about three in the morning on February twenty eighth, two babies and one very, very tired mother survived a labor that could have been worse. Nothing ruptured, nobody died, nobody bled to death, and besides being born a bit small for 'baby number two' at the time, everyone was healthy. It was another miracle that had come around._

“ _You know we're going to have to pick names now, right?” Jun asked, holding one child in her arms, while Makoto held the other with a pacifier hanging off of his shirt instead of the baby's swaddling. “Even I thought I had another month to pick.” She sighed, looking at the smaller child, still looking quite pinkish._

“ _We both agreed that we're not naming either one of them Roger.” Makoto half joked, still only half awake. “Didn't you say something about Satomi?”_

“ _Neither of them look like Satomi.” Even as fresh and new as they were, it was easy to tell what they'd be like. “...One of them is a Ryou. That's one of your grandparent's names, right?”_  
  
“Yeah, but he really preferred to be called Jiji. I didn't really realize his name was Ryou until he passed away.” Makoto frowned, looking at the child he held. “I really like the name Tadashi, though.” 

“ _Really?” Jun shook her head. “I thought you said you didn't like than name.”_

“ _I liked one of them. Ryou fits the one you're holding. He kinda looks like he's off in his own little world.” Makoto hummed._

“ _He's sleeping, that's why.” She retorted, rolling her eyes. “What about Takashi? It's close enough and it sounds better.”_

“ _...You know, you're right.”_

“ _Ryou and Takashi...You think they'll know how lucky they are to be here?” Jun asked, looking back to Makoto. “If being born on Leap Day wasn't enough...”_

“ _Leap Day, tiny mother...” Makoto shrugged, setting himself down in the chair he had pulled up to the bed. “They'll learn sooner or later.” Looking at the half awake baby in his arms, Makoto sighed heavily. “I think they got my looks. They're gonna look like me, aren't they?”_

“ _Probably. You look more like your father, anyways. It's easy to say your genes are a bit more pushier than mine.” Jun noted, brushing her fingers against the soft baby hairs that ran so dark over Ryou's scalp. “...They're both going to be great, though. There's so much potential for both of them. I just hope we can bring them up to what they aspire to be.”_

“ _We will.” Makoto leaned over the bed railing, pressing a kiss to Jun's forehead, all the while holding Takashi close. “They'll be amazing.”_

 


	8. Chapter 8

_"So tell me about your little mentee."   The conversation had gone a bit stale, as Takashi was growing tired.  He had tried to adopt a better sleep schedule for the Kerberos mission.  "Kinda sad that you didn't tell me about him."    Even so, he knew that Takashi was doing quite a bit anymore, and little details always slipped through._

_"He's more of a shadow for me.  I'm supposed to inspire him to become better.  I guess I'm just more like a big brother to him anyways."   Takashi sighed, shrugging his shoulders a bit as he swirled around the water in the bottle he was drinking from.  "Even so, congratulations.  We've got a new baby brother.  His name's Keith, and he's one of those troubled kids.  He...It's like he's strung so tight, he's going to break all at once."_

_Ryou frowned a bit, holding a sandwich cookie in the frame of the camera.  "You mean like he's just on edge, or he's absolutely out of it?"   When Ryou heard 'Troubled Kid', it more so reminded him of himself.  Can't sit still, always thinking, always doing.  Something needed to be done, there was always extra energy moving around.  "He's gotta be smart if he got into the Garrison.  Those exams are brutal."_

_"I know..."   Takashi sighed, leaning back in his chair a bit more.  "He's got potential, though, and he's grown on me.  I'm sure if I came back and dragged him back home for holiday season, dad would love him."_

_"Yeah, just slap a bow on him and say 'Hey guys, we got a brother for Christmas!  The third child you never knew you wanted!'"   Ryou teased, splitting open the cookie to scrape off the frosting first, then dunked the cookies in milk.  "I'm glad that you're actually helping him out.  If anyone can inspire someone to do great things, it's probably you."_

_"What, and you don't think you can?"_

_"Takashi.  I'm a walking train wreck.  The only redeeming quality is that I look like you and I can forge your signature."   Ryou blinked at the screen, gauging his brother's expression.  "...I get a lot of questions about autographs, okay?  And when it's little kids, I can't say no."   He sighed, straightening up a bit.  "...You sure you don't wanna stick around here on Earth for a while longer?  I know a guy who could fly to New Mexico and have you in New York in about sixteen hours."   He asked softly, watching as Takashi's face softened a bit more.  Watching his brother sigh, he knew what was coming._

_"Ryou..."   Takashi sighed, running a hand through his hair.  "As much as I'd love to, but I've got responsibilities.  I've got a exams tomorrow, I've got paperwork for the mission...I haven't even started packing yet and the trip isn't for two months."   Ryou could see the strain in his expression.  He wanted to.  It had been a long time since he cracked out of the mold he made for himself.  Just to do something spontaneous, like a handful of bottle rockets all in one go, or the first and last time they tried to fly with cardboard wings.  "...I will after I get back.  It'll just be you, me, and a long, long talk about what happened, and how Matt is crazy about space ice."_

_The smile both of them had was something that was a bit cold in the middle.  Like leftovers warmed through, but there was still a heavy cold spot in the center.  "Yeah..."   Ryou nodded, taking apart another cookie and ate the filling.  "You're going to have to buy me a round when you get back, though.  You're going to be banking on that money, you know."_

_"Hey, I at least want to remember what stupid shit we do when I get back, Ryou.  I don't want to wake up in Queens with a hangover and missing fingers."   He teased back.  "But hey, I'm gonna have to go.  It's getting late, and I really need some shuteye.  And it's late for you too, you know.  Get some sleep."_

_"Nah, I'll stay up and binge a few more episodes of...Whatever I've got on."   Glancing at the screen, it was one of those BBC dramas.  Something about space, or rather.  "I'll talk to you later, Takashi."_

_"Stay out of trouble."_

.-.. .- ..- -. -.-. .... / ... . --.- ..- . -. -.-. . / .- -.-. - .. ...- .- - .

 

 

Launch Day was tomorrow.  This was it.  They had scheduled it for three in the afternoon, and he'd be out of the atmosphere by three fifteen, maybe sooner.  He'd make a couple orbits, make sure everything was working properly, and go over all the safety protocol while on the ship, and then he'd be off on his own.  There were a couple of shuttles that he could stop by if he needed to, and the colony on Mars and Venus; which, was more of a detour with the Venutians.  All his things had been packed up neatly on the floor, and all the pictures had been taken down except one.  The picture of Takashi and Ryou on the first day still hung there.  Pursing his lips, Ryou took the photo and tucked it into his shirt, past the formals he wore for the time being.  

Nine in the morning.  It was time for press conferences for those who had heard about what was going on, policy meetings, and one final lunch with worldly pleasures before Ryou was reduced to eating freeze dried peas and mush.  The drab green didn't suit him very well, he noted.  His face was too thin, his eyes weren't bright, and his haircut...They had redone it so that it was a bit more in line with their policies.  High and tight, but a little more length on top.  He didn't like it.  The undercut he had was just fine, he thought.  

All in all, it was strangely somber.  The members of the crew that repaired the ship were there, green uniforms, red berets with all the adornments on the front of their outerwear.  In the sea of people, he was lucky that they had decided to not go outside like they had originally proposed, as the musty wool scent filled his nose as he sat down, the burst of air that had collected between the folds of his clothes came out.  There were at least a hundred people there, some with cameras, others with microphones and notepads.  

Sitting next to Aaron, things were slowly getting interesting as Iverson spoke first, addressing that there was a project going on, and they were bringing it to its final phase, its magnum opus.  The shudder of cameras and the flashes almost gave Ryou a headache, but he managed to close his eyes and purse his lips into a thin line.  

"You won't have to say much."   Aaron said quietly, nudging Ryou a bit.  

"I'm not worried about that."    If anything else, Ryou was good at bullshitting.  He could at least come up with something on the fly about how he's so excited to explore space.  To the press, it wasn't a rescue mission.  It was an exploratory finding of what was actually out on Kerberos, and what was left behind.  He would find out what was there, but he'd go a bit farther.  A lot farther, but hopefully not too far.  "I'm worried about what everyone thinks."

It was a legitimate fear, and the fact that they knew that Takashi was his brother was one of those things that may spark the big questions.  'What do you want to find out there?'  'Do you think this was an alien attack?'  'Why did you decide to pick up this mission after you dropped out?'  The goal was to not let them know that this was an endless exploratory mission.   Maybe a press conference was not a good idea.  

As soon as Iverson was done with his addressing speech, Aaron stood up and gestured for Ryou to stand as well.  Walking to the podium, Ryou stood in attention, looking out at the crowd of people.  Ryou suddenly realized that he wasn't so jealous of Takashi appearing on morning and late night shows.  Standing in front of people was terrifying.  All the faces, all the eyes, craving information.   He almost jumped out of his skin when his lightning fast thoughts were broken by Aaron's Southern twang.  

"My name is Lieutenant Aaron Barnes, and I have personally arranged this mission for Ryou Shirogane in hopes of finding and being able to put to rest the members of the Kerberos mission.  For fear of the same thing happening, we've decided to wait to go out and search the wreckage for answers."   Aaron said, looking at the crowd like it was nothing.  Panning his gaze over all the people, Ryou realized he was a natural.  "Senior Officer Shirogane is an amazing engineer, a talented pilot, and a bright mind to find what exactly happened."   He made it sound exactly what he thought it'd sound like.  Minor exploration.  Go in, get out, come home.  "Until we get an answer as to what happened and why, Senior Officer Shirogane will make his own post at Kerberos, sending updates and data on the situation.   

Aaron stepped back from the podium, offering Ryou to the stand.  Reluctantly, he stepped forward, gripping the sides with white knuckles.  "I'm...Ryou Shirogane, brother of the late Takashi Shirogane."   His voice sounded strange to him in his ears with the slight lag of the speakers.  Saying his brother was dead was even stranger to him, for whatever reason.  "I-"   The microphone rang for a moment, causing him to  draw back, wincing at the equipment.  "I'm elated to announce my solo journey to Kerberos in order to put to rest the question of what happened on the mission."   Ryou drew in a breath, panning his vision over the crowd, just like Iverson and Aaron did.  "The debris field is still orbiting the moon, so finding the root cause of the accident will be possible to find, if not easy."   

"How do you feel about the Garrison ruling the accident as pilot error?"   One of the reporters asked, the camera man next to him pointing right at Ryou.  Uncertainty passed his expression.   

"To be honest, it stings a bit.  Knowing Officer Shirogane as my brother, I had the highest faith in him that he was a fantastic pilot,"   He took a breath, stringing out words as they left his brain.  "But we're all human, and humans make mistakes, even if they are as bright as Takashi was."   

"What do you hope to find out there?"  Another asked.   The questions were strung one after another, until the end when Iverson checked his watch and stood up.  

"Do you believe that it could have been the work of aliens?"   One in the very back asked, slowly coming forward with an audio recorder.  It shouldn't have struck Ryou as it did, but he froze for a moment.   

"We're not taking any more questions, I'm sorry."  Iverson said, clapping a hand to Ryou's back, bringing him out of that faint shock.  "Thank you all for coming, this was-"

"I'm asking him!  Do you believe that your brother and crew were attacked by aliens?  Do you believe in life beyond ours?!"   The once calm and polite conference started to slowly get out of control, the small mass of people rising up with more questions.  The flashing lights and yelling from the group were enough to make him grow a bit anxious about the whole mission.  The look on the lone reporter's face was enough to haunt him as they ushered off the stage.  

The loud of the auditorium echoed in the hallways leading up to the place, where more reporters were slowly easing in.  "Why did you think it was a good idea to release a press conference, Barnes?"  Iverson sighed, taking off his beret, running a hand over the back of his head.  "We didn't need to do that."  

"Mm, we did, though.  After those kids, they need to be distracted from their disappearance and that lion you saw on the rooftop."   Aaron explained, glancing back to Ryou.  "Plus, they needed to see a bit of a familiar face to distract from that.  Everyone loved Takashi, and they're sure to love the hero searching for answers."   He hummed.  "Plus, the mechanics will probably be enough to satiate those reporters until they get bored and leave."   

Ryou stayed quiet through their talking, pursing his lips as he walked behind them.  "I never want to do that again."  He finally said, taking off his hat after the woolen fabric threatened to press the hair follicles back into his skin.  

"That's understandable, but you've at least got to do another one when you come back.  And you will be sending us updates as to where you are and what's going on."   Aaron hummed, looking back at Ryou over his shoulder.  "We'll go over that when you're in orbit."   Looking at the other's face, he sighed and turned around, stopping them both.  "It's a lot to take in as it is.  But you did wonderfully back there, and I'm proud of you.  You're going to do great."

He knew he had to say something back.  He couldn't just tell him 'yeah, okay'.   "I know I will."   Sounding self assured, Aaron smiled a bit, clapping a hand to his back.  "Good.  Now let's get some lunch.  I don't know about you, but I missed the breakfast round, and I'm craving something good."   

 

.--. .-.. . .- ... . / -... . / ... .- ..-. .

 

Launch day.  Ryou had slept in one of the chairs in the lab where he had done most of his work, leaving his previous room for the time being.  His morning started early. Up at six, physical at seven, breakfast at seven fifteen.  Final diagnostics on the ship at eight, practice suit up at eleven, followed by Lunch.   It was at eleven that he realized what was all going on and it hit him all at once.  Wearing the grey and orange space suit and the stretchy material that was supposed to protect his head as he put on the helmet, he couldn't believe it, but at the same time, it made all the right sense.  

He was going to search for his brother and the two Holts that went missing.  He was going to find them, bring them home, and everything was going to get better, things were going to go back to normal.  They'd all be happy again.  

"You know, orange suits you for some reason."  

Ryou turned his head to look at who it was, almost dumbfounded when Morrigan was leaning in the doorway.  "Aren't you supposed to be running diagnostics?"   Ryou snorted, pulling at the sealed parts of his suit, pulling it off with a hiss as it de-pressurized.  "Or is everything go?" 

"Everything's go.  Everything looks good.  Real good."   Morrigan strode over to Ryou as he peeled off the suit and set it aside.  It was easy enough to get on and off, but it kept a bit of heat that was pretty gross.  From the suit, something fell out, prompting her to pick it up and look at it.  "Wow...I didn't expect you two to look so much alike..."   She said quietly, looking over the photograph while Ryou sat the suit aside.  

"Well, that's the thing with identical twins.  They're kind of the same embryo for a while."   Ryou was being a smartass, and he knew it by Morrigan's eyes rolling at him.  Taking the photo from her fingers, he tucked it back into his shirt pocket.  It'd be plain, white shirts and khaki scrub pants for a long time for Ryou.  Not much choice in the fashion world remained when he was out there alone.  

"Good thing you're not the same person, right?  I've worked with Takashi once before when I was a junior officer, and he's too nice for his own good."   Mo sighed, shaking his head.  "I just thought I'd stop by before you went off for the day and catapulted yourself out into orbit.  And you know, give a proper friendly 'goodbye'."

"Eww, are you getting all sappy and sentimental with me?  That's gross."   It was enough to make Morrigan snicker a bit, nudging the other's shoulder as she uncrossed her arms from her chest.  "Save that for your girlfriend, she needs it more than I do."  

"Excuse you,"   Faux offense crossed her face as she held out her left hand, waving it by her face.  "Fiancée."   Ryou ate his words and grinned.   

"Congratulations, then.  I guess there's more than one good thing happening today."   The air grew a bit quieter as they both became somber, realizing that this was their  last goodbye as friends.  "...Thank you for helping me.  If it weren't for you, I'd probably still be comparing myself to Takashi.  We both know where that'd get me."   He said quietly. 

"Eh, it's just what I do.  I can't stand it when people wallow in their own self pity.  You just about made me throw up when I first saw you and you told me about how Takashi was always the better sibling."   She snorted, giving half a smirk as she gently punched his arm.  "I'm glad I could help you get on with your life and inspire you to live for yourself, and not just him and his memory.  I only regret not telling you sooner because God damn, you had a lot to say about him this past month."   Had it really been a month?  Time flew by without him even noticing, didn't it?  

He was almost still in awe about the fact that in five or so hours that he'd be in orbit around Earth for a couple days.  "Thanks for putting up with my excessive whining, then."   If this was going to be a goodbye, Ryou figured it was about time to say it.  Holding out a hand, he offered for a handshake, giving a loose smile.  "Maybe I'll be back in time to crash your wedding."   He hadn't expected to be pulled in so quickly, yelping as Morrigan pulled him into a tight hug.  

"You gotta make it back in one piece first, numbnuts."  Squeezing him a bit tighter until Ryou hugged back, Morrigan sighed and let him go after a couple moments. "If I weren't so hellishly gay and you weren't so awkward, I'd probably do a goodbye kiss or something, but that--"  

"That's really disgusting."   Ryou scrunched up his nose and grinned, shaking his head.  "The hug will do."  

After that, Morrigan left, leaving Ryou to his own devices, allowing him to put in any extra phone calls he needed before he reconfigured it to the ship's system.  Calling his parent's home phone rendered no answer, they must have been out or something.  Same with the cellular phone.  Instead, he left a message, pacing around the workshop.  "Hey, it's Ryou...I was just calling to make sure that this got to you."   He said, taking a deep breath as he pivoted on his heel.  "I'm gonna be gone for a while, and I'll at least try to keep in touch, but I'm not sure if I'll be able to."   Pausing again in the middle of the shop, Ryou ran a hand through his hair and stared at the floor.  "...I just wanted to say I'm gonna miss you guys, and I love you both so much.  I don't know if Dad's still upset with me or not, but I know what I'm doing is kinda stupid for the moment, and I know you said you still loved me no matter what, Mama..."   Giving another sigh, he pursed his lips.  "Just keep me in your thoughts, and I'll be back soon.   ...I love you."   

Hanging up, it almost felt like he was preparing for his own wake.  Like he was leaving behind messages in case they found him in a terrible, terrible way.  Or, realistically, if he burned up in the atmosphere instead of breaking through the ozone layer.  Even so, any way of dying outside of Earth would probably be a terrible way to go. 

In the coming hours, that was when the chaos and nerves started to hit their peak.  It was all becoming a big mass of photo taking, last minute checks, making sure there were plenty of supplies on the ship, and of all things, enough fuel, even though they had the two component system running on the ship.  Ryou had finally taken his seat in the cockpit, running his hands over the controls, activating the startup function.  The operating system had been synced to his phone, allowing him to remotely access it without leaving his cot if he wanted to.  Other command keypads were built into his space suit, giving him a chance if he got too far away from the ship.  

Even so, he noticed a few glitches in the programming--the strange language hadn't been fully removed from the OS, so there were occasionally some blips of leftover alphabets.  While he was gone, the Garrison was going to look over the alphabets and code to see what they could learn from the previous owners of the craft.  "Alrighty, all systems seem to be operating smoothly."   Ryou said, slowly pulling the craft out of the hangar.  It was almost like one of those training ships, big and clunky, but this one had an odd lightness to it.  It wasn't a fighter jet by any means, but it didn't feel like driving a minivan at the same time.  Almost like a SUV if aliens could make such a thing.  

_"Good deal.  Everything on the main command looks good, and you look like you're good to go.  Ten minutes until launch.  Go ahead and start taxiing around."_

Ryou still couldn't believe how well the craft he was going to be piloting rode so smoothly.  The low jets on the bottom of the ship didn't sputter like the Garrison's did, and it was like driving a luxury car on smooth asphalt.  An absolute dream.  Moving forward, he took it to the end of the tarmac, taking some extra time to do some extra checks and get himself strapped in properly.  Even with his suit on and his helmet opened up, he reached into his suit by wiggling out one arm and brought it in, rummaging around in his shirt for a moment.  Pushing out a familiar piece of paper, he took it with his other hand, sticking it onto the console with the sticky tack he snuck onto the ship.  

Another line pinged up on the ship's communication board, picking the call up instantly.   _"You ready to haul ass off of this planet?"_  Aaron came up on the line, a bit fuzzy at times with the reception, but otherwise fine.  

"As ready as I'll ever be."   Flipping a couple switches and testing the thrusters again, he revved the engine and looked back to the control panel.  Everything looked fantastic.  Pulling the ship into a tight circle, he started for takeoff like an old fighter plane.  "Starting initial ascent."  

_"You're going to want to get up to at least to the middle of the Stratosphere when you gun it out of the Mesosphere.  You'll break through easy enough."_   Aaron instructed.  As Ryou gained altitude, he couldn't help but to look down at the ground and smile like a madman.  It had been so long since he had actually been up and in the air like this alone.  It was like when they had first learned to fly the little two person planes back home--That same excitement and nervousness wound up in his chest and stomach.   _"Don't get too excited there, we can hear you breathing, you know."_

"I know, but...This is just...It's a lot to take in, and I'm actually..."   He replied, making wider circles as he ascended further and further up.  Twenty thousand feet, twenty five thousand feet...  The numbers on the altimeter grew.  As soon as he left Earth, it'd plink off, and he'd know he was on the right track.  "Thirty thousand feet...I'm leaving the Troposphere."   He announced.  Already, he could see the clouds below him, and the faint vapor trails of planes that had gone by earlier in the day.  Fifty thousand, fifty five thousand, sixty...  Higher and higher, he started picking up speed, pushing the engines a bit more now that he had more room and no worry about hitting anything.   

_"Pick up the pace, you're doing great..."_   Aaron's voice chimed in, the altimeter's numbers shot up as Ryou throttled the machine at the middle of the stratosphere.  The whole ship shook as he hit the more turbulent layers, pushing harder on the thrusters as he picked up more speed.   Ryou could almost hear the people in the background whispering as he felt like he wasn't going to make it.  The engines were sputtering already, and the tightness in his chest grew more and more until something seemed to snap, and the resistance stopped.  All at once, the jets powered higher and the system shifted, shooting him out of the Stratosphere, then the Mesosphere until the Altimeter plinked off, and all he could see was the Earth below him.  

"I'm out-"   Ryou breathlessly exclaimed, his eyes wide as he looked down at the globe below him.  "I'm...I'm starting my orbit, sitting outside the Thermosphere."   Looking over all the data on the dashboard, a map of their part of the galaxy came up, marking where he was with a small yellow dot.  "Everything's showing up perfect on the dash."   

_"The control room's going nuts, Shirogane.  Even I was holding my breath for a minute there."_  He still couldn't believe it.  This was happening.  He made it off the planet, and he was orbiting his home, or all places.  "I've got a couple things I gotta lay down before you get used to orbit up there."  A picture showed up on the screen, showing off a small probe looking thing. _"We've given you and The Wander some drones to send back to Earth when you can't reach us anymore.  When you get past Kerberos, we don't know how much farther you can reach without the messages becoming corrupted or garbled.   You just start logging data to the 'Drone Drive' on your phone, your wrist communicator with your suit, or manually on the dash of the ship."_

"Sounds easy enough."   Another image popped up on the screen, showing a red handled mechanism.  Looking down at his seat, it was right in front of him.  

_"That's a hyperdrive.  We weren't able to make sure it works, but the functions in the coding seem to be working properly, and all the elements that are connected to it are in tact.  I'm only telling you this so you can use it at your own risk.  If there's an emergency, or something happens that you need to get out of a place quickly, use that.   Otherwise, the main engine runs fast enough for the ship to make mini jumps._ "

"This sounds really professional.  It's like you're not making this up on the fly."   Ryou snorted, arching an eyebrow as the other grew quiet.  "...You're making this up on the fly, aren't you?"  

 

_"This is new technology to us.  We're not sure how far it works or how well it does, but it's there, and we've got to put a name to it."_ Aaron sighed, bringing up another image. "Your ship has external guns.  They're not like the fighter class guns, but they're not just a little tickle, either."   He explained.   _"Again, use at your own risk.  If you shoot at something and it shoots back, that's on you."_

There was the catch. Ryou pinched the bridge of his nose, pursing his lips.  "Well, I guess I can't be mad about it.  We're taking what we've been given."   He sighed.  "What a gift this has been..."   Even still, from where he was at, everything still put him back into that odd state of awe he was basking in.  "At least I got a nice view."   He murmured, looking out the wide windows.  

_"That you do."_  The connection was a bit rough around the edges, but from there, the long range connections from there that were even grittier.  Like he said, they were taking what they got. _"From here on out, it's all you.  You can come back down if you're having second thoughts, and you've always got a place back here.  I'm sure your parents would be happy to have you back on the ground."_

It was like he was poking at Ryou's heartstrings just to make sure he was set with what he wanted to do.  "I've already got a high standard set for me.  And I stood in front of all those people for a reason.  I'm set for the road ahead, and I don't plan on coming home until I get everyone back safely."   He replied firmly, giving a light huff.  

There was a bit of silence on the other end of the line, until Ryou could almost hear the smile and that unfortunate purr on his end.   _"I know you'll do great."_

Two days of check ins and more protocols and the like, and Ryou was set to go.  By the clock in his little ship, it was June tenth.   " _Goood_ morning, Galaxy Garrison.  This is Ryou Shirogane, starting the first part of The Wander's voyage to Kerberos, and possibly beyond.  Daily updates will be provided until the signal reaches its farthest capacity."   Ryou chimed, pulling the stick controls to the side as the engine and rockets powered up for a jump.  "Until then, See you all later."  

And without another word, Ryou shot forward into space, greeting the unknown with a wide smile and a tight grip on the steering mechanism.  It was only him, the endless expanse of space, and limitless probabilities as to what could happen.   With the souped up escape pod and hope to outshine all despair, Ryou was set on his goal.  

"I'm gonna find you, Takashi.  And we're both coming home this time."  


End file.
